11 november 2023 - patrycja kotek lyrics
past times don’t shock me, but i often wonder why. you once told me that i was a beautiful girl * yes, these words still echo in my head. but tell me why you never really loved me?
perhaps they were just empty words you spoke out of sympathy or an attempt to sweeten the reality. but i knew that an incredible feeling is born in your heart only for those on whom your true feeling fell. don’t i deserve this feeling?
all our moments together flash before me like a movie. i accidentally step into this magical past, trying to understand what went wrong. am i not interesting enough? are there too many responsibilities on my shoulders? or maybe it’s my appearance? unanswered questions haunt my mind, causing pain and sadness
but is it really my fault for not arousing your love? is it because my heart is beating too quietly? or am i just not what you were looking for?
i know that i cannot see my value only in someone else’s love. but despite everything, the words that fell from your mouth create an echo inside me. i often wonder what the real reasons are for your lack of affection. is it just a matter of our incompatibility which was inevitable?
i am aware that you cannot impose your heart on someone or force love. but sometimes i torment myself with the question why we weren’t allowed to experience anything. i blame myself for the doubts that have dug into my heart, making it difficult for me to find peace
today i am trying to come to terms with the fact that not every word or act of love is true. i have to believe that i deserve a loving feeling that will be with me forever. i need to look to the future, free myself from past disappointments and open myself to new possibilities
only when i believe that i am worthy of love can i find a partner who is willing to share this feeling with me. thanks to this, i am free from the question “why did you never love me?” and then i will understand that it was not i who failed to win your heart, but you who failed to understand my true value
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