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ucla - pacific purgatory lyrics

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often i find myself stuck somewhere i don’t want to be
im starting to think that there’s something really wrong with me
i don’t really go out much i mostly stay at home
but if i don’t go out sometime soon i’ll probably die alone

i must confess i am oh so afraid
times running out and i think its far too late
i’m looking for a girl that was never even born
the death of a fantasy that is far too pitiful to mourn

i never cared about politics and the bullsh*t of it all
i don’t care about anything my opinion is just too small
i’ve walked around the entire world and i would do it twice
i’m still looking for something that’s missing from my life
and i don’t even know what i’m looking for and i ask myself why
i feel so sad all the time but i can rarely cry
i know i have to love myself before someone else loves me
believe me i’ve been really trying but its just not that easy

i just wish that i had a normal brain
without the constant anxiety that drives me insane
maybe one day i will end up just fine
and i will no longer feel so dead inside

now i know that i don’t have to be afraid
and now i know it’s not too late it’s gonna be okay
i cannot wait for when you are here with me
when i can finally feel completely at ease

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