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no change - otitis lyrics

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[verse 1]

despite my imagination with the past
my infatuation with the last time my elation was at grasp
it’s all erased, outta hand, wanna go chase time but i can’t
do this with the hourgl-ss sand, the fate of time ain’t in my hands

i can’t control what’s in my dreams, so don’t tell me “forget it happened”
maybe if the present could compete, new thoughts would overlap it
maybe if the heavens would defeat these demons in my path then
i wouldn’t do this negative rap and i woulda moved on from my past and

d-mn, i’m feelin’ cursed, ain’t no balance, happy hurts
way up high, i hold this girth until i drop it in a verse
see, i got a gift, that’s why there’s no happiness
i’m just here to entertain and pain is just what comes with it

sometimes i enjoy the rain, i don’t do the sappy deal
flowers and meadows ain’t my thing, fire over daffodils
can’t ever take it out my brain, embedded and it’s trapped in still
in my eternal memory, it’s heavy but it’s so rather real

[hook]

and everyday is the same
i can’t escape from the rain
look in my eyes, see the pain
cuz i ain’t seein’ no change

they say i’m goin’ insane
can’t say it’s me who’s to blame
it’s like i’m stuck in this lane
cuz i ain’t seein’ no change

[verse 2]

dear lord, to you i pray, that you help me find my way
and although i ask always, there’s no response displayed
i dunno what’s good or bad but, i been tryna do what’s good
anything to move, i’d adjust, just tell me if i could

you took my grandparents, only got my mother left
and to see her cryin’ daily, ain’t nothin’ but stress
she ain’t happy, i ain’t happy, everyone depressed
why this happens to the good’s somethin’ i’ll never get

and i still ain’t signed, give a lil’ payback for these rhymes
so many years of wasted time, i fear i may not get to shine
livin’ like a movie, what comes next? you decide, i can’t expect
nothin’ good, cuz nothin’ yet, improved my life, my mood resets

daily, it’s the same old grind, gainin’ hours in my prime
fadin’ out with age and time, pain is nothing to my mind
yea, all i ask is improvement, grandpa, i know that you left
but i’m here and i’m workin’ through it, everything i do’s for you and

[bridge]

and i keep hopin’ and wishin’ just for the h-ll of it
see i’m just copin’, my wishes feel so irrelevant
and i keep hopin’ and wishin’ just for the h-ll of it
see i’m just copin’, my wishes feel so irrelevant

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