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that's the beat for me - original cast of zombie prom lyrics

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eddie:
“expose’,”
cries the usa
and the hypocrites keep low
nothing in the bill of rights
supersedes the public’s right to know
where there’s a scandal on the rise
i’ll be around to scrutinize
printing the facts behind the lies —
that’s the beat for me!

“have you heard?”
sings a little bird
who whispers in my ear
some movie star was spotted at a motel 6
with a well known mouseketeer!
celebrity heros, clean as wax
or hollywood nymphomaniacs?
america need to know the facts —
that’s the beat for me!

(to a group of entering secretaries)
you’re late!

secretaries:
sorry

eddie:
colleagues sometimes call me trash
hey, sometimes i agree
give me psycho k!ller moms
and i’m in ecstasy
all the dirt that’s fit to fling;
that’s my strategy!
secret desires of man and wife
private affairs and public strife
tamer than “playboy” but bigger than “life” —
that’s the beat for me!

josh:
(running in)
eddie flagrante?!!

eddie:
coffee. no sugar, no cream. black, black, black
something strong and ancient. i wanna taste the grounds, you got me?

josh:
no, but that’s not why…

eddie:
oh, yeah! and a donut…something with sprinkles would be nice

josh:
mr. flagrante, don’t you remember me? josh, from enrico fermi high

eddie:
oh, yeah! cub reporter from the “fermi gazette.”
hey, kid i wanted to thank you for the dirt on that hood who took the dive into the nuclear plant
great story! huge story! important! tragic! p-ssionate! off the stands by noon

josh:
well, it ain’t over yet. he’s back!

eddie:
he’s back? what are you talking about? he’s dead
he was buried at sea, in international waters…..

josh:
he’s come back from the dead. jonny warner is a nuclear zombie!

eddie:
a teenage nuclear zombie! are you serious about this?

josh:
would i make this up?

eddie:
i smell paydirt! hey, you wanna be a reporter, right, kid?
well, what are you standing around for? we got us a story to crack!

eddie/josh/copy boys/secretaries:
tamer than “playboy” but bigger than “life” —
eddie:
that’s the beat for me!

josh/secretaries/copy boys:
warts and all
who’s the man to call
when a story rears its head?

eddie:
me! me! me!

josh/secretaries/copy boys:
senators and prost-tutes and prison guards…

eddie:
and now the walking dead!

josh/secretaries/copy boys:
yeah, yeah, yeah!

eddie:
“lovesick senior in the green?”

josh/secretaries/copy boys:
naw!

eddie:
“the miracle of the toxic teen!”

josh/secretaries/copy boys:
yeah!

all:
all in expose’ magazine —

eddie:
that’s the beat for…
meeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

all:
yeah!
yeah!
yeah!
yeah!

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