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opening doors - original broadway cast of merrily we roll along lyrics

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[the slide reads: new york city 1957-1959. charley is at a
table with a portable electric typewriter; frank is at a piano, pencil in mouth, m-n-script paper spread in front of him.]

[charley types]

[frank picks out a phrase on the piano]

[charley types]

[frank plays the phrase, changing two notes]

[charley types a bit more energetically; the margin bell rings; he returns the carriage, rolls it up, starts to read what he has written]

[frank changes another note]

[charley grunts in displeasure]

[frank tries another note]

[charley rolls the carriage down]

[frank tries another note, getting desperate]

[charley x’s out what he has written]

[frank tries the phrase again, changes another note, finally slams his fist down in the b-ss and throws the pencil down in disgust]

[frank, spoken]
how’s it going?

[charley, spoken]
good. you?

[frank, spoken]
fair.

[charley, spoken]
yeah, tell me.

[the phone rings; frank answers]

[frank, spoken]
chinese laundry

[mary is at her desk, phoning]

[mary, spoken]
hi!

[frank, spoken to charley]
mary!

[charley, spoken]
say h-llo.

[mary]
i think i got a job!

[frank, spoken]
where?

[mary, spoken]
true romances

[frank, spoken]
posing?

[mary, spoken]
thank you. writing captions.

[frank, spoken]
what about the book?

[mary, spoken]
what about the book?

[frank, spoken]
nothing, are you working on your book?

[mary, spoken]
yes…

[frank, spoken]
good.

[mary, spoken]
no..

[frank]
mary—!

[mary, spoken]
right, i know, yes, me and balzac…

[she hangs up. they all resume work on their typewriters and piano.]
[charley]
i finished the one-act

so where are we eating?

i’m doing a rewrite

i rewrote the rewrite

i’m meeting an agent [frank]

i got an audition

rehearsal pianist

the publisher called me

i saw my fair lady

i sort of enjoyed it [mary]

i started the story

i’m moving to playboy

my parents are coming

i threw out the story

[all]
we’ll all get together on sunday

we’re opening doors
singing, “here we are!”
we’re filling up days
on a dime
that faraway sh0r-‘s
looking not too far
we’re following every star
there’s not enough time!

[the stage becomes alive with activity: charley being interviewed by an agent; frank playing the same bars of rehearsal music over and over while dancers rehe-rs-; mary meeting a musician on a subway. frank suddenly gets an idea, plays his phrase in the middle of the “rehearsal” and writes it down excitedly, then crosses, as do charley and mary.]
[charley]

i sent off the one-act

i dropped out of college

they’re doing my one-act!

we started rehearsals. [frank]
i called a producer

he said to come see him

i’m playing a nightclub

i rewrote the ballad. [mary]

i started the story

i met this musician

i’m moving to redbook

i finished the story

i threw out the story
and then the musician
i’m moving to popular science

[all]
we’re opening doors
singing, “look who’s here!”
beginning to sail
on a dime
that faraway sh0r-‘s
getting very near
we haven’t a thing to fear
we haven’t got time!

[all three throw themselves simultaneously into activity; charley and mary type ferociously while frank whistles and hums as he tries out a different vamp for his tune. after a bit, he hits a chord triumphantly, turns, and looks over at charley as mary picks up her phone and starts to dial.]

[frank, spoken]
how’s it coming?

[charley, spoken]
good. you?

[frank, spoken]
done!

[charley, spoken]
one minute…!

[the phone rings; frank answers]

[frank, spoken]
hamburg heaven!

[mary]
hi!

[frank, spoken to charley]
mary!

[charley, spoken]
say h-llo!

[mary]
i got another job!

[frank, spoken]
where?

[mary, spoken]
chic!

[frank, spoken]
what’s that?

[mary, spoken]
a brand-new concept: pop-up pictures.

[frank, spoken]
what about the book?

[mary, spoken]
what about the book?

[frank, spoken]
did you give the publisher the book?

[mary, spoken]
yes…

[frank, spoken]
good…

[mary]
no…

[frank]
mary…!

[mary]
look, i never—

[charley rips the paper out of the typewriter]

[charley, spoken]
finished!

[frank, spoken into phone]
let me call you back.

[mary, spoken]
right.

[she hangs up]

[charley, spoken]
this is just a draft.

[frank, spoken]
right.

[charley, spoken]
probably it stinks.

[frank, spoken]
right.

[charley, spoken]
i haven’t had the time to do a polish…

[frank, spoken]
will you sing?

[charley, spoken]
right!
(sung)
“who wants to live in new york?
who wants the worry
the noise, the dirt, the heat?
who wants the garbage cans
clanging in the street?
suddenly i do

[during the following, joe josephson is wheeled in by his
secretary [gussie] and starts to listen judiciously, as gussie
waits behind the chair; frank and charley are auditioning for
him; charley sings, as frank accompanies him]

[charley]
they’re always poppin’ their cork
(spoken)
i hate that line—
(sung)
the cops, the cabbies
the salesgirls up at saks
you gotta have a real taste for maniacs—
suddenly i do!

[joe]
that’s great! that’s swell!
the other stuff as well
it isn’t every day
i hear a score this strong
but fellas, if i may
there’s only one thing wrong:
[to frank’s tune]
there’s not a tune you can hum
there’s not a tune you go
bum-bum-bum-di-dum
you need a tune to go
bum-bum-bum-di-dum
give me a melody!

why can’t you throw ’em a crumb?
what’s wrong with letting ’em
tap their toes a bit?
i’ll let you know when
stravinsky has a hit—
give me some melody!

oh sure, i know
it’s not that kind of show
but can’t you have a score
that’s sort of in between?
look, play a little more
i’ll show you what i mean…

[frank resumes at the piano]

[charley, overselling]
who wants to live in new york?
i always hated the dirt, the heat, the noise
but ever since i met you, i—

[joe, shaking his head, still smiling]
listen, boys
maybe it’s me
but that’s just not a
hum-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-able melody!

write more, work hard
leave your name with the girl
less avant garde
leave your name with the girl
just write a plain old
melodee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee…
dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee…

[gussie wheels joe off. frank and charley stand
downstage dejectedly for a moment; mary joins them]
[charley]
they’re stopping rehearsals
they ran out of money

they screwed up the laundry

we’re being evicted. [mary]

we lasted one issue
my book was rejected

my parents are coming

i saw the musician

i’m having a breakdown! [frank]

the nightclub was raided
i have to start coaching

my wallet was stolen

[all]
we’ll all get together on sunday
they’re slamming the doors
singing, “go away!”
it’s less of a sail
than a climb
that faraway sh0r-‘s
farther every day
we’re learning to ricochet
we still have a lot to say

[frank]
you know what we’ll do?

[charley, spoken]
what?

[frank]
we’ll do a revue

[charley, spoken]
what?

[mary, spoken]
what?

[frank]
we’ll do a revue of our own!

[mary, spoken]
what?

[charley, spoken]
where?

[mary, spoken]
why?

[charley, spoken]
when?

[frank]
not just songs, but stories
scenes, piano pieces, mime!

[charley, spoken]
yeah!

[mary, spoken]
“frankly frank!”

[frank]
a showcase of our own!

[charley, spoken]
where?

[frank, spoken]
the club’s reopening.

[mary, spoken]
we’ll write a lot of new stuff—

[charley, spoken]
rewrite old stuff—

[frank, spoken]
what about the girl?

[charley, spoken]
what about the girl?

[frank, spoken]
only that we’re gonna need a girl.

[charley, spoken]
well, mary—

[mary, spoken]
thanks, i don’t perform except at dinner.

[two girls hold rehearsal copies of music, ready to audition. the first girl starts, singing shrilly and off-key as a pianist accompanies her]

[first girl]
who wants to live in new york?
who wants the worry
the noise, the dirt, the heat
who wants the garbage cans clanging in the street—

[frank, spoken]
thank you for coming. next eight, please.

[second girl (beth)]
they’re always popping their cork

[frank, spoken]
up a tone.

[beth, spoken]
—the cops, the cabbies
the salesgirls up at saks—

[frank exchanges a look of approval with mary and charley]

[frank, spoken]
up a tone.

[beth]
—you gotta have a real taste for maniacs—

[frank, spoken]
thank you. you’re hired.

[beth, spoken]
i’m beth.

[frank, spoken]
i’m frank.

[beth]
i really thought i stank.

[mary]
i’m mary.

[charley]
charley.

[frank]
by the way
i’m told we open sat-rday

[charley, mary, & beth, spoken]
what?!

[mary]
you’re not serious!

[charley]
n0body’s ready!

[frank]
apparently someone cancelled a booking

[charley]
the songs aren’t finished

[mary]
and what about costumes?

[beth]
and how do i learn all these numbers?

[frank]
i’ll bring you the copies of everything later this evening
[beth]
okay, but i’ll have to have all of the music and
sat-rday i’ve got to sing at a wedding. oh
god, is there dancing, ’cause i’m not a dancer [charley]
not to mention i still haven’t finished the
synanon song or the kennedy number

and what’ll we do about getting publicity
run around town putting stickers on windows [frank]
you don’t have to, we’ll segue the
end of it into the dance we cut out

no, we’ll use it but not with the long introduction [mary]

and have we decided or not on the restaurant sketch?
i need two or three days to replace it

[all]
we’ll worry about it on sunday!

we’re opening doors
singing, “here we are!”
we’re filling up days
on a dime
that faraway sh0r-‘s
looking not too far
we’re following every star—
there’s not enough time!

we’re banging on doors
shouting, “here again!”
we’re risking it all
on a dime
that faraway sh0r-‘s
looking near again
the only thing left is when
we know we should count to ten—
we haven’t got time!
we haven’t got time!

- original broadway cast of merrily we roll along lyrics

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