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if a girl isn't pretty - original broadway cast of funny girl lyrics

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[mrs. strakosh, spoken]
f-nny, when people pay good money in the “theayter” – especially the male element – they want something to look at!

(sung)
if a girl isn’t pretty
like a miss atlantic city
all she gets in life
is pity and a pat

[mrs. brice]
is a nose with deviation
such a crime against the nation?
should i throw her into jail
or drown the cat?

[mrs. strakosh, mrs. o’malley & mrs. meeker]
she must shine in every detail
like a ring you’re buying retail
be a standard size that
fits a standard dress

[mrs. strakosh]
when a girl’s incidentals
are no bigger than two lentils

[mrs. strakosh, mrs. o’malley & mrs. meeker]
then to me that doesn’t spell success

[eddie]
if a girl isn’t pretty
like a miss atlantic city
she should dump the stage
and try another route

any guy who pays a quarter
for a seat just feels he oughter
see a figger that his wife can’t
subst-tute

kid, my heart ain’t made of marble
but your rhythm’s really horr’ble
and that map of yours just ain’t no
valentine

everything you got’s about right
but the d-mn thing don’t come out right
so forget it, kid
and just resign

[heckie & two workmen]
if a girl isn’t pretty

[cardplaying group]
if a girl isn’t pretty

[keeney group]
if a girl isn’t pretty

[all]
if a girl isn’t pretty
if a girl isn’t pretty

[heckie & two workmen]
she should get a job
go get a job
get any job

[all]
get a weekly pay

[girls]
’cause if a girl isn’t pretty
like a miss atlantic city

[all]
she’s a real miss n0body, u.s.a.

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