slobb - omen (2) lyrics
(o m e n)
i just dropped two t-rds in the sink
haven’t done the laundry in about three weeks
it’s amazing how i manage to stay clean
when there’s garbage everywhere and there’s sh-t in my sink
then you walk into my room, it’s a mess
there’s pizza on the floor and you can smell the f-ckin’ sweat
there’s no sheets on my bed and i’ve got boxes on my desk
i never wash my clothes, so all my jeans distressed
i got milk in my fridge that expired in ’07
got a jar of mayonnaise that expired in ’11
i don’t cook, i don’t clean, i just heat up lean cuisine
now i’m watchin’ episodes of family guy on my tv
(hey, hey graham, can you p-ss me the, uh, cheetos?)
(yeah, the one under the couch or the one under the tv?)
(just give me both, i’m kinda hungry)
(okay, that’s chill)
(yo, we got the green flavor!)
(eugh-)
i just dipped my b-lls in the ranch (it’s great!)
now your girlfriend lick it off cuz i ain’t got a plate
cuz my roommate took a sh-t in the sink (i’ll clean it up)
man, i don’t really care, cuz why should i care?
i got thirty cans of nos stacked up by my couch
there’s a puddle at my feet i don’t know nothin’ about
cuz i’m way too ‘fraid to find out what it is
i’m like thirty-five percent sure it ain’t my p-ss
my bed’s just a sheet on the floor
by the dozen stained sheets sittin’ feet from the drawer
i ain’t even seen the shower in a week
i don’t get it, i sprayed axe, but the room still reek
gotta take a sh-t
so i take out the p–p bucket
now i gotta wipe but we don’t got wipes so i gotta get the vacuum and suck it
but the vacuum was jammed
so i pull up my pants
and i take a deep breath
and i just use my hands, yeah
just me and my roommates, chillin’ at the dump
i just moved about an inch and i found some new crumbs
sh-t’s sweet! i don’t even have to find a snack
we sit playin’ games while we scratch our f-ckin’ sacks
ay, my d-ck’s got more cheese than a twenty-inch pizza
uh, don’t shake my hand when you say nice to meetcha
(that was f-ckin’ off the dome)
(not really, i wrote that)
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