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is this life? - novi novak lyrics

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let them know
let them know
ya know
okay
from growing up poor
seeing what they all got, making me want more
my life was sh-t, yeah i been through it all
never needed room service for no wake up call
is this life? i’m still not sure
used to be love sick over girls then i found the cure
was a lot of sh-t trying to get my foot in the door
but gr-ss only come out greener with a little manure
so i take that detour, i hit the record
and fames allure only made me more insecure
especially when it’s premature and i ain’t mature
and my whole life was spent in doubt and feeling so unsure
cause when you’re the only person that believes in yourself
everyday feels like you’re going through h-ll
so don’t try to tell me i don’t deserve heaven
that’ll make me 180, pull a 187
i told everyone i love i’mma buy them nice things
so it seems if i fail, i let down both our dreams
i had a team, they gave up on me
kind of friends are those?
that change they minds like b-tches change clothes
but maybe i’m not the same nove?
but it’s bros before hoes
unless your bros become hoes
you know?
so, please don’t call my phone
tell people you know me, the old me
or brag how we was homies
when i make it, just be complacent
in your choice to not stick with me
when sh-t got risky with wealth
when i was trying to help
and you still ain’t did sh-t with yourself
because i’m going to make it, don’t worry about me
further i get, little further i see and i know
it’s just a road from here
it’s just a road from here
that ain’t the chorus, it just need some singing
oh sh-t, wait a second, oh, we reconvening?
cause i was scheming, thinking of my next move
and i was beaming, fighting what the stress do, yeah
it’s a lot of work acting like the coolest guy
when “save me” was my song about suicide
made some mistakes, but how new was i?
look at my first mixtape, how true was i?
there’s nothing fake, listen, escape and truly vibe
and you’ll completely understand why they truly lie
i’m so unruly, i ratio tears to laughs
why am i so angry?
well, why the f-ck would you ask?!?
cause it’s hard enough living, let alone staying on task
while people who worked this hard to a half are having a blast
while i’m constantly depressed, having lots to say
almost feeling like if i make it, i hope it stay this was
cause i don’t want to lose my balance for the hatred’s green
when you can’t purchase p-ssion or important things
and grandma, sh-t, i ain’t trying to seem rude
but we was so poor, cereal’s my favourite food
and if you listening, i miss you
sorry i never come to visit, i’m just so busy trying to get you
that new six coupe for putting up with my sh-t through
the years and helping me through my pain and tears
cause now kids say i’m a lyrical g*nius
and i say thanks for actually listening
cause it’s all that’s actually missing
it’s all that i ask
and i’m glad you’re a fan at last
cause on my path i’ve seen so many f-cked up things
drugs and alcohol steal people’s dreams
money reach out, drown and steal people’s teams
and lies bag up until it breaks the seam
or so it seem, people love you ’till you have no use!
godd-mn, ain’t that the truth
cause you here one day and then the next day poof
and if you a n0body, n0body going to need the proof
i can’t explain who i am for certain
it’d be like explaining a rainbow to a blind person
but life’s funny, ain’t it?
that picture in your head never comes out
the same when you paint it
but i place blame so much to a certain degree
it’s almost obvious, the person to blame is me
it’s almost obvious, the person to blame is me

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