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lilac heart - not koi lyrics

they love the way my eyes look dead when i look at my camera
i don’t think i’ll ever figure out why i’m like that
i’ve had a noose around my neck, one foot in the grave since i was 3
you don’t wanna be with him well why not be that for me?

can we find a brand new way to breathe?
lower me so softly so my hair’s in the sea

i’ll cry in my room, won’t leave like 2015
because all i do is think of things that i can’t be
spent so long wishing that i could die
but i never thought about any reasons why

does it make more sense to be with them?
cuz they never cared about me in the end

the stars on my ceiling are all falling down
and when i look in the mirror all i see is a clown
maybe i’ll release another song or two
because the more that i write the less i gotta think of you
i’ll drink up my words like the poison that they are
and let you rip out my lilac heart

well, it sorta bugs me that people don’t just leave me alone
when i wanna stay home
i don’t mind going out once in a while
if it’s with you
i really appreciate everything you’ve done for me
the others try to push me to be better
and i know that came from a place of kindness
but you’re the one who actually came through for me
so i… wanted you to know that
just promise to check in on me now and then, okay?
i’m going to do great things!
…once i figure out how to average things

- not koi lyrics

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