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ellipses - nost lyrics

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was it my chromosomes or my childhood home that made me strive to be alone?

i deal in only the dullest edges, safe on ledges overlooking my books and lack of reason to doubt them. but still shout when ellipses speak free instead of me, and pauses draw “dot-dot-dots” along chronicled mistakes i make. admitting with tight lips i’m far better off than the tingling cough of all loss tossed aside in prideful denial of what it means to be stunted. each short stride cut shorted and hunted by quarter rests alined to the speed of speech facing you and absence. they have since hints dropped concerning our talks meaning next to nothing, but fingers hot buzzing to your shut numbing the need in me, but again, in that head lies the need for some disguise so i say it’s the weather. not your laugh l1cking feathers on me or the sprouting of leaves lighting fire beneath me. when really, your sky eyes make mine trace lines twice the size of you into nights of sheets strewn sleepless, with deep rest the last thought fleeting with carelessness. feeling it’s way to another drink, sinking in careless ink, so please, never listen when wrists won’t–these words simply splattered in quick stroke to make it a trick to not face it. the carc-ss of patience and hiss-spit of dumb sh-t re-saying it’s inept-tude in shrewd loops of dark truth and attention seeking bereavements of people gone like seasons past. so please, just as means simply lead to an end, please don’t forget that a friend won’t just kiss in pretend

was it my chromosomes or my childhood home that made me strive to be alone?

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