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"honest" - nico collins lyrics

maybe it’s the way i was born and raised
cut off my emotion to survive my days
now i see people as a way to get by
all i gotta do is find the truth in my lies
five months later, you’re still around
you should be embarr-ssed by the way i let you down
making excuses for you and not me
blame it on yourself cuz you’re too afraid to leave
you keep saying that you’re needing me
see me for the man that you swear i’ll be
but you ain’t gonna know me the way i do
i’d never give it up on a life for two

gun to my head and you know you can’t help me
another in my bed and you know you can’t help me
took another hit and you know you can’t help me
just go, yeah, just go
i don’t understand why you’re so forgiving
caught me red-handed but you still won’t listen
you know what i told you since the day we started
i’ll always be “honest”

the cops are at your door and they ask you where i am
you paint a puzzled face and you lie for me again
risking your life like you do a hundred times
eventually you’re gonna take the fall for my crimes
slam the door and look me in the eye
screaming this is gonna be the last time
you’re tired of me taking advantage
so i cry and you pay for the damage

when it gets heavy you break down and say
“why are you heartless who made you this way?”
i stare at you vacantly right through your face
i draw a blank
i-i-i draw a blank
throwing my sh-t cuz you don’t understand
the reasons behind why i am who i am
you beg for the answer we know i don’t have
i draw a blank
i-i-i draw a blank

i have betrayed you
i have betrayed you
please don’t forgive me i’ll do it again
i have betrayed you
i have betrayed you
i’ll always be “honest”

- nico collins lyrics

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