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mario vs luigi - mr. jay (rap) lyrics

[intro]
rap battle! super smash brothers free*for*all!
mario
vs!
luigi
3, 2, 1, begin!

[verse 1: mario]
let’s*a go! nintendo’s mascot and the best fighter around
i’m valiant, a hero! the reason peach is safe and sound
and they’re putting me against my own brother? what a joke
because we all know i’m*a number 1, i don’t choke
on the mic, breaking blocks, breaking stocks, i’m the best!
you can shove that year up your b*tt while i take the rest
jab grab, give you mario’s finale, you’ll fail
because in battle and that hat, you’re taking the l!

[verse 2: luigi]
it’s that time of the year i start my negativе zone
in your shadow? no longer! it’s best if you just go
it’s luigi timе! there’s nothing you can do
you suck way more than my ghost*catching vacuum!
give mr. video a beat till he loses all his fame
since you’re the least interesting character in the game
looks like player 2 is number 1 now, okie dokie!
working with flows so ill, call me dr. luigi
[verse 3: donkey kong]
got a bite like a kremling, you know me well
and i’m finally back to kick some plumber tail
now if you both don’t mind, let me bust a rap move
and stretch my arm into those noses just for you
luigi’s just a clone of mario, but he’s slow though
go back to doing shrooms, i’m a gargantuan solo
throw a barrel on your face, better get out of my country
’cause i wipe out the battlefield with just a down b!

[verse 4: yoshi]
wow! i don’t mean to be a bad egg, but i gotta say
mario! it that really you? you’ve put on a cr*pload of weight
i was chillin’ peacefully on my island, you’ve messed with the wrong dino
take another step closer and i’ll headb*tt you like a rhino (yoshi!)
dk thinking he’d win, he’s full of bananas, unless you wanna get kicked from the forest to savannahs
and i won’t exclude these 2 paisanos, get off my back! this man’s gotta go!
know that you’re too fat to ride me around, go sit in a wagon
as i head off and take the crown as the 1 true super dragon

[verse 5: link]
you brothers better put a muzzle on this green twit
or the genderfluid barney’s boutta have his tongue slit
it’s about time that i can rap on my own accord
so you better hey! look! listen! once i pull out my master sword
as i jump and thrash, rap and dash, slicing you down with a triforce slash
leaving an unattractive gash, cut you into pieces with my aerial attacks
i’ve got wisdom and courage and strength and as i look hot
i’ll send you down the abyss and climb back up with my hookshot!
[verse 6: samus]
coming in to see fools with a tope tier endeavor
“better pull out link’s bombs!” said no player ever
up*b, boomerang? your attacks are overused
you’re pathetic, people always choose your chibi over you
screw your slash attack kid, i’ve got guns packed and blazing
video game’s first heroine, you know that i’m amazing
let this be known to the world
all of these so*called “valiant soldiers” just got beat by a girl!

[verse 7: fox]
how cute, the bottom*tier queers think they have a chance
well guess what? i’ll barrel*roll and hear the chants of all the fans
i’m a star, fox will quick dash you and make sure that you fall
i’ll arwing it, bring a landmaster, shatter robotic b*lls
reflect a diss you spit at me? heh, down b
stop trying to act like you’re a man samus, you belong in a gown, see?
locking on these targets, breaking them, my bars are imperial
come on, you forget you’re fighting the top*tier material!

[verse 8: kirby]
hi! it’s kirby, straight from dream land, you inbred
i wouldn’t press b to eat you, i’ll beat you instead
i’ll use my paintbrush to crush this fox into 16*bits
and this broad is crazy, people only care about her t* (eyaaaa!)
so swallow your pride, you might shed a tier
when i copy your abilities and end your career!
cooked up a fresh verse, my game is full of glamour
now step off the battlefield before your face meets my hammer
[verse 9: pikachu]
the fan favorite’s come to cite a rap part
top tier up in here, been on top since the start
fox’s machines won’t help him once they’ve all turned to rust
now i’ll turn this pink puffball into dry dust (pika!)
been hanging with the best since 1999
i hear that you’re good at sucking kirby, just listen to your rhymes!
you express cowardice hidin’ under your little rock
so my victory shouldn’t really come off as a shock

[verse 10: jigglypuff]
stop trying to shock me ’cause now i’m rocking the console
screw using a moon stone, all alone i’m on a roll
testin’ and electric alien with too much shock for his cranium
no wonder we’re hatin’ him, get this mouse out of the stadium!
once i sing my song, you’ll be having to sleep tight
pikachu? what’re you? should i fight or wish gesundheit?
these huffs had enough when my ups are too rough
so stuff your tough bluffs, you can’t match the ‘puff

[verse 11: captain falcon]
(yes!) the pilot of the great galactic race is ready to spit
what’s a lab rat and balloon against my powerful kick?
in a race, the last thing i’d wanna hear are your ditties
link over here can’t talk, he belongs in mute city!
i’m on top, what they say about a captain is true
i’ll choke a bottom tier till they turn big blue
raptor boost! don’t you know i eat these animals for lunch?
bring this battle to a halt with a falcon punch!

[verse 12: ness]
you’re earthbound to lose when i’m spitting pk fire
my frames are invincible, having the combos puff desires
n0body survives the storm, especially flamboyant falcons
ness has stepped onto the plate to strike out captains (okay!)
you’re only used for spam while i’m a magical hero
on the tier list, you rightfully deserve the title “f*zero”!
when i knockback your attacks you’ll never recover
once i bring down the thunder, you’ll cry to your mothers

[verse 13: master hand]
you’ve reached the boss level, the smash is now in my palm
time for the final match out of your toybox, no johns!
you must be crazier than my brother to challenge this deity
evil executive! the wicked tremble upon just seeing me
now it’s time for a sudden death, this is your final destination
i’m at the my core, the greatest entity, i paved the smash foundation
pokémon, pixies, and plumbers, with a dark dive you all lose all the same
time to put the toys away, it’s the end of this game!

[outro]
who won?
who’s next?
you decide!
stay tuned for the next rap battle!

- mr jay rap lyrics

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