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how to have sex - michael callen lyrics

there across a crowded rooms
to demand my dreams
he was a long and lean, mean s*x machine
packed in five*oh*one jeans
he looked me over from my hair down to my shoes
then he said, “sorry boy
where you’ve been?
ain’t you heard the news?”
he said, “although i’m not crazy
i don’t take no chance
i don’t kiss, i just reminiscence
i keep it in my pants.”
woah*oh

how to have s*x in an epidemic without getting caught up in polemic
how to have s*x in an epidemic without getting caught up in polemic

home alone, late at night
taking matters to my own hand
laid back, relax, betamax
playing those
“boys in the sand”
take it, shake it, just looking for a little release
when in burst the p.c
(politically correct)
safe s*x and thought police
“stop right there
we’ve come to put you to the test
you better call your lawyer
boy, you’re under house arrest.”
woah*h
i’m going crazy with someone
tell me, what’s a poor boy to do?
he said “i can’t do this, and i can’t do that.”
oh, i’m so confused
can it be like a fantasy?
can it be like it used to be?
can it be like a fantasy?

how to have s*x in an epidemic without getting caught up in polemic
how to have s*x in an epidemic without getting caught up in polemic

oh, i miss the 70’s
things seemed so simple then
so many men, so little time
ah, i remember when
where we leading my friends?
can you tell me who can say?
with what is safe and what is not
changes day*by*day
got a lemon?
learn how to make some lemonade
get a rubber, find a lover
in time you will discover, it’s okay to get laid

i’m going crazy with someone
tell me, what’s a poor boy to do?
he said “i can’t do this, and i can’t do that.”
oh, i’m so confused
can it be like a fantasy?
can it be like it used to be?
can it be like a fantasy?
how to have s*x in an epidemic without getting caught up in polemic
how to have s*x in an epidemic without getting caught up in polemic
how to have s*x in an epidemic without getting caught up in polemic
how to have s*x in an epidemic without getting caught up in polemic
how to have s*x, how to have s*x, how to have s*x, how to have s*x

great s*x is healthy s*x!
(yeah, let’s hear it for healthy s*x)
(yay!)
(just say no)
(no)
(no)
(yeah, you take that healthy s*x)
great s*x is healthy s*x
(no)

- michael callen lyrics

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