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drifting - mia stegner lyrics

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to think that at falling i used to excel
now there’s demons to quell and sentiments to sell
to my brain to convince her it’s safe to let go
on nights when she seems to believe that she clings to a cliff that would drop her
to some sort of h*ll
but it’s just a pillow — not a cliff just a pillow

i would like to fall asleep
but i refuse to count the sheep
my brain is telling me i’d rather stare into a screen than dream
and though i know it isn’t true
i feel i need a clue or two
have i lost the sk!ll of drifting to my other world in a lovely way?

it used to be so easy (easy, easy)
i used to be awake for the moment that i fell
it used to be so easy (easy, easy)
i used to be awake for that moment, alive for the moment
that i fall asleep, now i refuse to count the godd*mn sheep

to know that at times i will spend the day waiting for night
to return to the warmth and the stillness, the quiet
the dark should be simple so why is it not?
i’ll cry that at times i’m not wise i romanticize lies as i’m lying there too cold, too hot
but it’s just a place to close my eyes — it’s just a place to close my eyes
lately i don’t give myself to sleep, it takes me
it’s a waiting game that i don’t play very well, will it break me?
and while i’d love to love dark skies, i despise the rise of how i
(i despise the rise)
*n*lyze, antagonize, and agonize and alphabetize
(before the fall)
visualize, familiarize, fantasize and fictionalize
(before the fall)
teach me how to tranquilize, teach me how to catch my thoughts and revise
(before the fall)

i would like to fall asleep
but i refuse to count the sheep
my brain is telling me i’d rather stare into a screen than dream
and though i know it isn’t true
i feel i need a clue or two
have i lost the sk!ll of drifting to my other world in a lovely way?

it used to be so easy (easy, easy)
i used to be awake for the moment that i fell
it used to be so easy (easy, easy)
i used to be awake for that moment, alive for the moment
that i fall asleep, now i refuse to count the godd*mn sheep

why do i refuse?
why do i refuse?

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