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shopping in lidl song - mercedes benson lyrics

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[verse 1]
put on my blue tracksuit, and i got on a bus
sat down by the man stinking of stale p-ss, and got up again with minimal fuss
at the mecca bingo, where the muslims go to bet
yeah i got off at the right bus stop, but i ain’t done no shopping yet

[chorus]
but i’m walking to lidl
yeah i’m walking with my primark shopping bag
walking to lidl
‘cos there’s a special on my favourite f-gs

[verse 2]
saw the half price chicken, on the corner of aisle 6
saw old mavis had her eye on it, so i nicked her walking stick
now security, they did not see me
they just loitered ’round the door
but i’ve got chicken in my bag and with the special on f-gs, i know i’m coming back for more

[chorus]
i love shopping in lidl
i love 20 packs of crisps for 15p
shopping in lidl
cider for 10p is great for me
shopping in lidl
the only place to go to get your fill
shopping in lidl
where you end up with a minus £10 bill

[verse 3]
they’ve got coffees on the counter (ooh ooh)
bananas hanging in the air (ooh ooh)
with your limited funds you can still buy food
when you think you haven’t got a prayer
you’ve got a prayer in lidl

[verse 4]
down in the wine and beer aisle, i fill up my bag with booze
they ask me if i’m gonna pay for it, i said is the pope a jew?
so they take me into the office, and i shout with all my might
they said “tell me are you a robbing slag?”, i said “yes i am tonight!”

[chorus]
i love shopping in lidl (shopping in lidl)
tins whose labels i can’t understand
shopping in lidl (shopping in lidl)
it’s a cut-price shopping wonderland
shopping in lidl (shopping in lidl)
it’s a place where dreams are bought and sold
shopping in lidl (shopping in lidl)
a multicultural place for young and old

[outro]
put on my blue tracksuit
(i forgot the f-cking milk)

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