he vas my boyfriend - mel brooks lyrics
[frau blucher]
love comes when you least suspect it,
love dances in on a whim,
i thought maybe i could direct it,
but i never expected…
a guuy like him.
he was a bully und a brute,
he vas as crazy as a coot,
still i didn’t give a hoot,
he vas my boyfriend!
with ev’ry voman he vould flirt,
he alvays treated me like dirt,
but i vas happy to be hurt,
he vas my boyfriend!
i vas as pure as a virgin meadow,
lying with vicotr in the gloam.
then he turned to me, that charmer, whispered, “let’s
play farmer.”
and plowed me ’til the cows came home!
he vas a monster and a beast,
his midnight bangings never ceased,
it didn’t faze me in the least,
he vas my boyfriend!
(spoken)
i’ll never forget the first time i met victor. it vas
on the village green,
at the annual bock beer festival, where every beer cost
a bock.
i vas an innocent young lamb and he was a dirty old
goat.
ve vere made for each other.
all of a sudden, he took out his paraphernalia and
shouted,
“let’s play croquet!”, and off to the field ve vent.
he carried his hoops and mallets and i carried his
balls.
what a festival! fun and games all day long. archery,
badminton, potato sack.
victor won the three-legged race… all by himself. it
vas love at first sight.
(sung)
he vas the one i gave my heart to,
but ve never wed even so,
if i mentioned wedlock,
he’d put me in a headlock!
vhen i asked to be his wife,
he stabbed me with a kitchen knife,
ach, where did the good times go?
if he had an angry fit,
i vas the first thing that he’d hit,
but i didn’t give a sh-t…
he vas my boyfriend!
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