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tell me, ernest - megan hilty, jennifer simard & christopher sieber lyrics

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[madeline]
so tell me, ernest, what would you do to me? aesthetically?
a lift, a tuck, a freeze, a sock, some filler in the chin?

[ernest]
oh, goodness, no

[madeline]
no, really, tell me, ernest, if you had your way with me
medically, are we talking face, chest, thighs, br**sts?
oh, god, i don’t know where to begin
what about the stain on my leg?
i stressed it out from doing squats on the reg
do you have time on tuesday to squeeze me in?

[helen]
i told you, ernest doesn’t really do that

[ernest]
but she’s a friend, tuesday’s doablе

[madeline]
mm, doable, huh?
so, tell me, ernеst, how much have you seen of me, cinematically?
the roms, the coms, the rom*coms, the dramas, the dramedies, the straight*to*dvds
no, really, ernest, how often have you watched me?
[ernest]
uh, sporadically

[helen]
what?

[ernest]
i really liked the one where you were fighting with a sword

[madeline]
oh, thrust!

[helen]
that was her first razzie award

[madeline]
you know i did all my own stunts
i only injured all of my co*stars once
now swordplay foreplays one of my specialties
we need another bottle
i must be boring you senseless
i’m just so thrilled that you both are here
treat her well, i haven’t seen her this happy in years

[ernest]
well, here, here
[helen]
thank you for this sincere

[madeline, helen & ernest]
cheers
i’m so glad we did this

[helen]
well, this has been so much fun, but oh, gosh, look at the time

[madeline]
oh, please, you don’t have anywhere else to be
our helen, always worrying
but tell me, ernest
how’s helen in the sack?

[helen]
mad

[madeline]
just curious
i’ve known this girl for twenty years
and never have i ever heard her make a uh*uh*woah

[helen]
hey
[madeline]
i’ll lighten up, ernest

[helen]
we should be heading back

[madeline]
uh*oh, she’s furious
come on, now
you know i’m just having fun
ooh, we’ve only begun
a toast to friends for life
that’s right, you’re stuck with me, ernie
thank your wife

[helen]
well, it’s been fun, but we gotta go
i think i’m done, gotta hit the road

[madeline]
i must be boring senseless

[helen]
oh, we must be bored

[helen & madeline]
i feel so thrilled that we’re out of here
we should do this again

[madeline]
how’s next week?

[helen]
how’s next year?

[madeline, helen & ernest]
cheers, cheers

[madeline]
i’m so glad

[ernest]
so glad

[helen]
so f*cking glad

[madeline, helen & ernest]
we did this

- megan hilty jennifer simard christopher sieber lyrics

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