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i love killing rappers - mc hammersmith lyrics

[verse 1: mc hammersmith]
i love k!lling rappers, yeah that’s what i say
i love k!lling rappers and it’s not a rap cliché
lots of rappers say they k!ll rappers habitually
but i mean literally, k!lling rappers is my favourite activity
the first rapper i k!lled, i k!lled him accidentally
i was at a rap show and the rapper energetically
said “throw your hands up!” which is what i did
but i was holding a beer bottle, and it slipped from my grip
and in slow motion, as i was gasping for breath
the bottle hit the rapper and it glassed him to death
he fell to the ground with a cold bl**dy tremor
people were screaming as they ran from me in tеrror
and in that moment, i dawned upon the thеory
if i k!ll rappers, people will start to fear me
and fear equals power, which i’ve never had before
i had a taste for k!lling rappers, and now i wanted more
the thought of k!lling rappers had me in a loop
so i put an ad on craigslist for a rap writing group
at my local café, five of them assembled
four up*and*coming rappers and a woman named beryl
beryl had just wandered in, she was eighty one
they said “do you wanna join?” she said “that sounds fun!”
i thought “oh no, beryl, i don’t want to dispatch her”
but she was part of the group now, so she was technically a rapper
for 45 minutes i led a workshop in rhyming
sweating profusely about the murders i was priming
they wrote raps about smashing mics and catching bodies
then, when they were distracted, i poisoned all their coffees
in a matter of seconds, all of them were deceased
beryl whispered her last words: “f*ck the po*lice”
in that chain coffee shop i said “my k!ll count rises”
five rappers dead in a costa living crisis
but i wanted more, more rappers to take down
so i decided to k!ll every rapper in my town
to gain fear and power, so i could be formidable
but i couldn’t do a drive*by, my license was provisional
so i planned to k!ll rappers with shots to the brain
as long as they were walking next to a bus lane
it took a few months, but i went on a k!lling spree
and beryl’s bus pass meant i was travelling for free
every rapper in my area, i had left in tatters
now i had to k!ll anyone who was tenuously a rapper
i defined the art of rapping by the lowest denominator
so i k!lled some slam poets and a horse race commentator
anyone who talks fast was basically a rapper
the man at the auction house * i k!lled him with his little hammer
under my patio is where all these rappers rest
i buried them, and changed my rap name to flows west
to k!ll even more rappers, to the city i moved
fast forward to now: my k!lling rate has improved
i k!ll rappers every day, i k!ll rappers every hour
i k!ll them in my sleep, i k!ll them when i’m in the shower
i k!ll them every second, the frequency matters
i k!lled my family * in case they’re secretly rappers
k!lling all these rappers might bad for my health
i’ve just realised, i’m a rapper, so i need to k!ll myself
[gunshot]
now i’m a motherf*cking ghost! yeah you heard that right
i’m a motherf*cking ghost, and i’m moving through the night
i’m back from the dead with the ghostly swagger
i’m glad i k!lled myself, ‘cos now there’s one less rapper
but just ‘cos i’m a ghost, that doesn’t mean i’m stopping
i won’t rest ’til every rapper’s in the ground and rotting
i still k!ll rappers daily, carving their memorial
but i can’t k!ll them physically, because i’m non*corporeal
so i shout “boo!” and that tends to do the trick
they have a heart attack and they die, like super quick
and i even get assistance from my ghost rap crew
even beryl’s in it * “well, it’s something to do”
if you’re wondering why i do this, please don’t be perplexed
and if you’re a rapper listening, you’re motherf*cking next
because i love k!lling rappers and i’ll never lose my touch
yeah i love k!lling rappers… maybe too much

- mc hammersmith lyrics

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