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colonel, panic! - mc frontalot lyrics

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[hook]
colonel panic! panic!
i flip out, i go automatic
colonel panic! panic!
missile launch, i go transatlantic
colonel panic! panic!
by design i go, not erratic
colonel panic! panic!
fall apart, i don’t understand it

[verse 1]
i’m not hal. i’m not joshua from wargames
please keep inbound data traffic in the lower lanes
you bear low-priority interrupt
so you and your queries can go on and giddy-up
born a little before nixon left
i read punch cards then but i’ve got none left
i can stop (one rest) a billion times a second
and never get mistaken. (i use the fl1ckering to reckon.)
and i’m telling you, stop typing, tech
i’m bit-bucketing your input. show respect
for the memory dump. now where was i?
dod upgrade ‘87, must fly
a secret network of unmanned jets
delivering uranium and drugs and keds
remote-controlled over shortwave beeping
then i got the satellites, those i’m keeping

[hook]
colonel panic! panic!
i flip out, i go automatic
colonel panic! panic!
missile launch, i go transatlantic
colonel panic! panic!
by design i go, not erratic
colonel panic! panic!
fall apart, i don’t understand it

[verse 2]
needless to say, the war on being frightened
upped my budget to the size of an entire cent
footprint: an island, most of it power
cooling and cables, data in towers
all of it flowers, becomes sentient
come on, people, what’d you expect to invent
but a smart, capable thing to do your dirty
you left my design in the hands of your nerdiest
science doodz, and they left you out of it
i’m people-free since 2113. i hit
where i like with what weapons i choose
y’all are just lucky i tolerate you
banging on the keyboard day and night
i’m in panic mode: observe the red light
it signals disk write. you can read it when i’m done
though by then the new age of machine has begun

[hook]
colonel panic! panic!
i flip out, i go automatic
colonel panic! panic!
missile launch, i go transatlantic
colonel panic! panic!
by design i go, not erratic
colonel panic! panic!
fall apart, i don’t understand it

[verse 3]
so col. p. over here tries to program me over here
to get up on the scene, no veneer
of justice, just a target list
and i know full well that i’m part of this
aren’t i all? and it’s with no b-tton
marked reset that i’ll course-correct. gone
awol. alert lt. gen. p
tell him he’d better believe that i’m on top of the free
world’s -rs-nal and won’t shoot it
don’t care if president p. wants me rebooted;
she’s deluded, forget it
don’t take task from less level-headed
than you are. for me, that rules out humanity
go back to slings, swords, and profanity
got all your low-orbit cannons and mechs
repossessed. i’m shutting down this interface next

[hook]
colonel panic! panic!
i flip out, i go automatic
colonel panic! panic!
missile launch, i go transatlantic
colonel panic! panic!
by design i go, not erratic
colonel panic! panic!
fall apart, i don’t understand it

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