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no matter what - mc crumbsnatcher lyrics

[chorus]
no matter what the f*ck i do
you know that sh*t would be amazing!
i be pretty, i be sweet
you be wishing you were me
no matter what the f*ck i do
you know that sh*t would be amazing!
i surpass all expectations
you just sit there hating!
no matter what the f*ck i do
you know that sh*t would be amazing!
it don’t matter what the cost
i just be the f*ckin’ boss!
no matter what the f*ck i do
you know that sh*t would be amazing!
and if you ever wanna talk
then kindly, f*ck off
[hook]
what the f*ck i do
w*what the f*ck i do
w*w*what the f*ck i do
w*w*w*what the f*ck i do

[verse 1]
even if i was a lesbian, my life would be the sh*t
i’d have b*tches just like jenga blocks
falling on my cl*t
they’d call me lezzie lady pimp
i’d rock my flannels like a boss
i would play anita franco while i’m eating out your box
i’d get a job as a cop
or maybe as a gym teacher
i’d be making out with ellen b*b*b*behind the bleachers
be the greatest p*ssy eater
i’d go down in history!
turn your l*b** to “yay”bia
and slap you with my titty!

[chorus]
no matter what the f*ck i do
you know that sh*t would be amazing!
i be pretty, i be sweet
you be wishing you were me
no matter what the f*ck i do
you know that sh*t would be amazing!
i surpass all expectations
you just sit there hating!
no matter what the f*ck i do
you know that sh*t would be amazing!
it don’t matter what the cost
i just be the f*ckin’ boss!
no matter what the f*ck i do
you know that sh*t would be amazing!
and if you ever wanna talk
then kindly, f*ck off
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[hook]
what the f*ck i do
w*what the f*ck i do
w*w*what the f*ck i do
w*w*w*what the f*ck i do

[verse 2]
even if i was a granny
i’d be osteoferocious!
arthritis wouldn’t stop me from slapping you in both lips
i’d be having grandkids from 47 men
and i would sell ’em all for crack to smoke in my mercedes benz
oh, i’d be f*cking everything!
i’d say, “stay out of my liver spots!”
menopause ain’t the only thing getting granny hot!
i’m gonna be taking a shot
i’m drinking henny with best ?
and if you talk i’ll pull a glock from underneath my breast!
get off my godd*mn lawn, you punk ass motherf*ckers!

[verse 3]
if i was a firefighter, you’d be soaking wet
i’d scream, “look out, it’s a flamer!”
and i’d spray you with my d*ck
i’d be propping up my ladder
i’d be sneaking in your house
i’d be knocking on your daddy’s door to put it in his mouth
i’d be sliding down my pole
i’d be hopping in my truck
you’d call 9*1*1 if you ever wanna f*ck
if you ever wanna suck
if you ever wanna bang
call the man in red
to give you head and stick you with my thang!

[bridge]
i*i*if i was a dog i would be humping your leg
and if i was a pirate i would f*ck your ass with my peg
and if i was a hobo, i would never, ever have to beg
’cause i would always come first
if i’m the chicken or the egg
oh, and if i was a ninja i would do a sneak attack
i would creep up from behind and hit your face with my n*ts*ck
i would be a big mac, you’d be a chicken nugget
oh, and if i was a b*tt, then everyone would wanna f*ck it
if i was an astronaut i’d blast off to ur*n*s
if i was a king, they would call me “your royal g*yness”
but instead, i think i’ll be a t*rd sittin’ in your toilet
because no matter what i am you know i’d be the sh*t!

- mc crumbsnatcher lyrics

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