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mistletoe meltdown - matthew parker lyrics

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[verse 1]
i was ten years old, waiting on christmas day
i could hardly wait, it was just one week away
and there were christmas parties every couples days
with all my relatives so old, they got one foot in the grave

[verse 2]
i was ten years old, waiting on christmas day
i was happier than santa in his sleigh
when all of a sudden, uncle john pointed out there was mistletoe
right above me, then my great-aunt betty

[pre-chorus 1]
she leaned in for a kiss and i was mortified
my whole ten years of life flashed right before my eyes
and i said

[chorus]
get that mistletoe away from me
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
get your face away from me
no, no, no-no-no
get that mistletoe away from me
ain’t n0body want no cooties
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
no, no, no-no-no

[post-chorus]
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
no, no, no-no-no

[verse 3]
i was ten years old, waiting on christmas day
as a ten-year-old, my face needed some sp-ce
so no offense to loving aunts, give your poor matthew a chance
and just don’t kiss me, i’ll get ptsd

[pre-chorus 2]
she leaned in for a kiss and i was mortified (i was mortified)
i’m sorry, ancient lady, but i would rather die (i would rather die)
and i said

[chorus]
get that mistletoe away from me
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
get your face away from me
no, no, no-no-no
get that mistletoe away from me
ain’t n0body want no cooties
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
no, no, no-no-no

[post-chorus]
oh, no
i don’t wanna kiss n0body, no, no, no
no, no, no-no-no

[bridge]
all i want for christmas is peace on earth and no kisses
and who on earth am i kidding, lots and lots of presents
but if i can’t have all this, i’ll settle for no kisses
this year, ooh

[chorus]
get that mistletoe away from me
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
get your face away from me
no, no, no-no-no
get that mistletoe away from me
ain’t n0body want no cooties
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
no, no, no-no-no

[post-chorus]
oh, no
i don’t wanna kiss n0body, n0body
no, no, no-no-no
oh, no
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
i don’t wanna kiss n0body
no, no, no-no-no

- matthew parker lyrics

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