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drunken santa's coming to town - matt rogers (parody) lyrics

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who do you know with a liver that’s huge
a big red nose and guzzles down booze?
drunken santa’s coming to town

he’s ringing a bell and holding a cup
playing santa claus beats sobering up
drunken santa’s coming to town

he gets himself kicked out of bars
for p-ssing deadly gas
he came with two boots leaves with three
one wedged up his -ss

dogs lift their legs to the jolly drunk elf
but he doesn’t care, he pees on himself
drunken santa’s coming to town

(instrumental)

mommy, mommy, can i sit on santa’s lap, please
sure honey, go ahead
(santa gagging and coughing)
oh, mommy, santa smells. ewwww
what do you want for christmas?
i want to go home
(gags) but i’m santa claus. (burp)

he likes to drink a six pack
and hang out at the malls
he’ll give your kid a candy cane
that he used to scratch his b-lls. (burp)

he wears a red head, black belt and a scarf
his beard should be white but it’s covered with barf
santa’s gonna show up
stagger ’round and throw up
drunken santa’s coming to town

- matt rogers parody lyrics

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