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phone call (skit) - lunar c lyrics

[phone call: prank caller & lunar c]
hello?
hello?
hello?
hello there, this is simon calling from your internet service provider
right?
yep, that’s right, i’m just calling you to report some suspicious activity that we observe, coming from your computer
from my computer?
but it seems that it’s been downloading too much uhm…well too much porn, are you uhm-are you aware of this?
you’re talking to me on my phone mate, what internet service provider are you talking about?
oh, well you might not be aware of it because there’s a virus on your computer and that will be a virus that just visits websites with porn in and watches videos
i don’t have a computer, what do you-i don’t know what you’re talking about
and you’re sure you’re not doing it yourself?
who the fuck is this? who are you?
no, no, no i understand, it’s not you who’s watching that filthy stuff is it? or is it?
who’s called me? who are you?
is it you actually?
i watch porn yes, i wank over porn. who the fuck are you?
no, okay well-
what?!
okay, in that case, my advise would be, do a complete virus scan yeah
listen fuckface, who are you? who are you? who are you?
and the last bit of advice, no, no, no, i want you to listen very very carefully here…
suck a fat ‘un, bell end
okay, stop watching so much porn
but your mum keeps making it, if your mum stops making it, i’ll stop watching it. now fuck off

- lunar c lyrics

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