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i'm suffering, help me. - lil goat lyrics

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[verse]
every day i’m fighting battles and n0body knows
but instead of talking ’bout it, i like keeping it closed
hide my pain with a smile, underneath that; it shows
but sometimes it’s hard to hide so i weep ’till it blows
i just wish i had someone who understood me for real
not someone who say they love me just to see how i feel
i would never make these scars if i knew i could heal
i put every drop of hope into a dose of some pills

hopefully they make me feel better
i knew my girl would break my heart and i still let her
i went and put myself through h*ll so she’d feel pleasure
while i was fixing, she was breaking that was real clever
i’ll never put my love in another person
what’s the point? in the end i’mma end up hurting
i never told you i was perfect but at least i’m worth it
how you go from saying “baby” to “this isn’t working”?

i just don’t appreciate the way you treating me
i’m at war with my depression and it’s beating me
laying dead in a coffin where i need to be
and all i wanted was for someone to believe in me
but at the end of the day, i believe in myself
’cause you went and changed on me when i needed your help
and this ain’t about the money, yo, it’s deeper than wealth
i just need someone to save me from myself or else
[hook]
i’mma keep cutting my wrist ’till i can’t feel no more
maybe rip the bandage off so i can’t heal no more, yeah
you say you love me but i’m still unsure
and i’m not needy but i still want more, yeah

and i’ve been battling depression since i was 11
funny how a demon made me feel like i’m in heaven
and i’ve been through everything and i’m steady stressing
and all i want is better things and that’s my confession
and when i pass away please don’t say you cared for me
’cause when i really needed you, you wasn’t there for me

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