mc dead man (man) - lil' d juicy lyrics
lil’ d juicy’s second single
“mc fred man (man)”
(lil’ d juicy)
yo!
lil’ d juicy! back at it again!
with anotha one!
this one’s for… fred
fred sucks
a lotta haters out there callin’ me fred
my name’s not fred, don’t call me… fred
so… it’s gonna get funky
freestyle… nah mean?
yeah
yeah, uh
fred, like the guy from harry potter
george shrinks, like your b*lls when you dip ’em in cold water*
like an otter. bet you still play on a t**ter*totter
put my b*lls on one end, your mom on the other
your mom goes up, my end hits thе grass
your mom slides down, my schl*ng in her ass
she’s p**ping and farting, maybе i should pass
pass gas so nast’ it change the forecast
all this talk about niagara falls?
you don’t even consider the size of my b*lls
i look in the mirror… lake superior
you look in the mirror? … wiener
your name’s mcfred? mcdonald’s bread?
ronald mcdonald, his b*ttcheeks are spread
spread ’em like b*tter onto the bed
stds leave fred capital d dead
easy breezy beautiful * uh * lemon squeezy
fred squeezy cheesy out his peeny
he be getting greasy on his rgb pc
lil’ d juicy’s is blue and squeeky cleany
i wear this helmet to protect myself from bullies
and all the cute girls who want to give me pulleys
i ain’t no simple machine. i’m a winner
pull on my lever to receive a sticky dinner
you take pics of my mom for her onlyfans?
joke’s on you, she’s seen all you x*ray scans
shooting webs from you d*ck like spider*man?
she told me otherwise and that you have a tiny glans
it’s a serious problem, you should get it checked out
and maybe stop sticking my mom’s d*ck down your throat
don’t pout. go suck on a water spout
poor african kids would be jealous no doubt
fred? like freddy krueger?
having wet dreams and you look like a tumor
even martin luthor wouldn’t dream about you, sir
while you sit there sucking on a big ol’ rooster
your mom is making mac’n’cheese
your d*ck looks kinda j*panese
old and twisted like bonsai trees
squeeze out peas, sudanese disease
your d*ck is like a usb stick
gotta flip it over to make it fit
you have to have s*x upside*down*flippy
d*ck tippy, b*lls drippy, suckin’ on yo mama nippy
you rap alright for your age, but please;
this lil’ d juicy can rap in chinese
ding how wing ching ping pong wong
that translates to “i just farted on your mom”
freddy. shreddy. d*ck like confetti
already, my d*ck is all sh*tty. you feel me?
you feel me. hand on my p*n*s. negus
three strokes of my b*lls and my d*ck is a g*nius
einstein, cheese. hardy boys on their knees
g*y mysteries, incestual tease
the missing chums. hands on their peens
cum in their bums and occasional beans
it’s egregious. general grievous’ p*n*s
roger roger, a fuzzy roger
skin in your boot. t*st*cl* dodger
lieutenant dan in shrimpy water
forest gump, he wrote you a letter
but he couldn’t read it, like stevie wonder
sh*t’s kinda wack. the ability to read
he seemed to lack, maybe because he was…
black *out back in grade seven
box to the head, it was like your soul went to heaven
since then, you never been the same person
running around shoutin’ “durka durka durkin”
you drink beer? alexander keith’s?
alan turing’s apple. go ahead, sink your t**th
waddle like a penguin, d*ck in a sheath
hang it on your front door like a christmas wreath
the last verse didn’t even make any sense
now… take off your pents
i know you’re hard for this lil’ d juicy
show me your b*lls… please show me
this lil’ d juicy is juicier that atlantis
your pants is drier than new mexicas
affectionist… for your mother, give her s*xy p*ss
you jizz all over my mother but you f*ckin’ miss
three pounds of ground beef bound to my ass cheek
my c*ck is weak for your mom’s sweet feet
i have a tradition of jumping into the street
sending a fleet of blood straight to my meat stud
sucking ya mom’s crud. doggie dud, dog time
covered your mom in frog slime. what a time to be a lime
fred a little stinky. his rhymes are d*nky. d*cky sticky
the skickymobile at your door come to steal all your privacy, you feel me?
yeah, my b*lls are like onions
peel ’em back into the crack of ya mom’s buns
my big ol’ nuts, they weigh tons
s*x with your mom, wear condoms
wouldn’t wanna make any cumlube kids
shouldn’t but i gotta take long ass shids
gone for an hour, send the search and rescues
grant macdonald f*cked his nephews
(sgt dan)
fred, fred, resting your head
broke into your house while you’re still in bed
depression hit pretty hard
when that p*ss slushie made you a tard
ass cheeks shaking on the screen
looking like a libtard drag queen
(lil’ d juicy)
yeah
yeah, uh
your mom is sucking on my t*st*cl*s
while im giving her breast*tickles
mc fred man gettin’ a spray tan
more orangar than a p*rn star, ok bien
mme pushie’s p*ssy is far to bushy
or maybe i’m a woosie, my d*ck’s pretty mushy
you and me, toilet seat. trick or treat. white sheet
pounding on my meat. p**py feet. give my nuts a yeet
mask on, pants off, more suck, less cough
fever, sore throat. what are ya talkin’ about?
something 19. stay home, suck peen
feel my weiner. order dinner
skip the dishes, chips’n’fishes
diarrhea. north korea
launch codes, suck chodes, watch lana rhoades
my d*ck is froze, like elsa’s toes
d*ck like olaf, in a snowbank
lost my glasses, now how am i s’posed to w*nk?
serve me burgerbuns like your name is frank
pics of frangus in my spank bank
youber, zhatka, covered in luber
cps high score, workout b00ber
oh my goodness, you as ugly as i am
go to sobeys, where the f*ck is the spam
you suck and your b*lls smell like f*ck
aw f*ck. cluck, cluck. a duck stuck in the air duct
imposter looking kinda sussy with that impressive posterior
i wanna feel your buns on my c*ck, like a sock
f*ckin’ in muck*in’ ‘n’ suckin’ fer good luck
leprechaun john with the golden pot
f*cks a lot, so hot, b*lls taut, d*ck rot
back from the time slot that i fought a robot
robo*b*lls, s*x dolls, in the bathroom stalls
y’alls are sperm donors. y’alls got perma*b*n*rs
shooting magma sperm out my magnum worm
sea bass, got a bus pass, gonna meet a lass, gonna meat her ass
she gonna pass gas so nast’ it’ll change the forecast
maybe record it and make a podcast
d*ck, f*ck, struck by a truck
now it’s shaped like a hockey puck
tarot card, carrot tard. f*ckin’ in the yard
glass shard in my bard*hole, f*ck a mole
stripper on a pole, ass ripper goin’ for a stroll
f*ck*b*lls in a bowl, d*ck small
f*ck a whole chicken with my d*ck in a vice
chinese rice, f*ck a mice, t*st*cl* lice
roll my b*lls like dice, c*ck*f*ck in spice
you got shriveled b*lls like dumbledore
and a massive droopy c*ck like eeyore
d*ck so floppy it hits the ground
ball nowhere to be seen, check the lost and found
yesterday, your were mowing grass and hit a rock
not with the mower, but with your bil ol’ c*ck
there’s no possible way your d*ck could hang lower
maybe go ahead, run it over with the mower
your mom’s b00bies are becoming froze
warm ’em up when i stick the up, up my nose
she drops to her knees and there she blows
blows her nose all over my toes
boogers on my feet, green piggies like angry birds
slingshot my b*lls, ricochet, make cheese curds
tie*dyed spermicide, p**p on the playground slide
it’s liquified. don’t touch it, or you will died
when you see me, you’ll get a negative thought
luigi’s mansion is the only option you’ve got
gun to your head. make it buckshot
fred is dead, but his mom; most certainly not
i could bone your mom for hours
her b*ttcheeks gave me superpowers
my mad b*lls sk!lls are a gift from her ass
sling my nuts around, yeah spherical mass
there’s no way into your mom’s mountain
when she keeps *rg*sming like a fountain
so much liquid, it’s a tidal wake
give it to chase to cure his headache
what the f*ck?! why would you do that?
he drank it all because he is a tw*t
sank my b*lls into your mom’s shat hole
she’s startin’ to fartin’ all over my fat pole
look at the porsche * oh wait * that’s mine!
the licence plate says “fap 69”
your suckin’ on your mom’s teat in the backseat
we’re driving to sobeys to steal the canned meat
heres a joke for you there is a white dude
in the store are shopping for chocolate
and find a black man
(laugh)
my nuts are like the twins from terraria
starin’ at ya, givin’ you malaria in the *n*s
it’s painless
unlike your mom’s insane tits
those b00bies gave me a b00boo, her p*n*s too
waist thick
chinese man ran in front of a van
after they put a ban on dog spam cans
i cried, so sad
checked the dictionary for the meaning of b*lls. it said:
found under the d*ck; a powerful tool to make fred dead
my nuts were chosen to be frozen
in a stasis chamber for your mom’s research paper
d*ck turned into vapour
my nuts are coated in the remnants
of when your mom deep throated my bloated c*ck
and my c*ck exploded
my nuts are massive and impassive
and your mom’s throat was acid. rapidly
my d*ck was permanently flaccid
my nuts are sentient and thawing
and drawing pictures of a beaver clawing at my nut cheese
gnawing on my b*ttcheeks
i’ll admit it fred, you were right
i was in the bathroom stall with your mom one fateful night
my p*n*s was broken, your mom was chokin’
the pain came fast when i lost my long mast
my stick got small in the bathroom stalls
but her b*ttcheeks gave me these godd*mn tactical b*lls
the doctors tried to graft my shaft back on
but it was far too gone, it all went wrong
i wish i had a d*ck like yours
but i can’t complain when my b*lls can do chores
everynight, i’m covered in wh0res
i give them tours of the inside of my shorts
i wield my deep fried c*ck like a sword
keep my cuts clear of the cutting board
a huge h**rd of fred is approaching fast
take ’em out with one swift fart from my ass
lil’ d juicy, i’m on a safari
i’m driving through africville in my ferrari
i’m sorry * i guess that sounds kind of racist
these monkeys have just made me lose all my patience
they p**ped all over my and on my car
brown ferrari. that’s a step too far
they call me the man in the yellow helmet
got dozens of monkeys trapped in my bas*m*nt
you got a big ol’ cog
mines like a hobbits
when bard k!lled smaug
i grew two hot timbits
one big c*ck
and a bad case of rabies
you’re a probable cause
to make your dog have babies
toss her down the sewer
after you do her
then jerk off to the poo fur
you’re a s*xual entrepreneur
put my big ol’ c*ck
in your mom
but when i took it out
it was completely f*cking gone
orange you glad my banana was in your mom’s ass?
got two nice nuts to prove it, but alas
i’ll admit your d*ck is bigger than my own
but really, it’s the b*lls that make your mom moan
i talked to your mom last night on the phone
she said “fred is the best when it comes to the bone
but lil’ d juicy is always welcome to my home
his b*lls are amazing. they make my mouth foam”
yeah
they make her mouth foam
yo!
that’s a wrap!
lil’ d juicy! my second single
fred sucks. ya know? so… uh
i’ll be back, yuh… with anotha one
in the meantime… don’t call me fred
my name is not fred
so… lil’ d juicy…
signing off
hoo*
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