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fearz - legible lyrics

(verse 1)
used to tell myself to give up- i’m through
cut your losses, guess you went far for a white dude
now i’m rippin’ every single beat i write to without trying to. i guess i’d like to hit the road one day, get to the city i grew up in and do a show until the sound and lights blew
thought i’d take the beaten path, that’s the tried and true but is this life true?
so i might lose my temper on these haters that’ll spread their biased views
you’ll never find your type of music, it’ll find you
when i listen to my conscience i get lied to
this is imperfection times 2

(verse 2)
imperfection times 2
they’ll wonder when my- hypes through
when it comes to an end, the swine flew
when it comes to the pen- i’m knife proof
better cover your neck when i’m dumpin the lead cause these
bullets can serve as a spine screw
they love disrespecting the the wise youth
if you bite my style, i’m tyson huge
so my diet consists of the same thing that mike chews
i don’t pick who to k!ll, i let the mic choose
but yet my fright looms- what should i do?
–
what should i do? (3x)

(verse 3)
i’m caught between being at my peak and not starting yet
giving myself room to breathe yet it’s hard to vent
telling myself that there’s no end in sight, yet i need a bed for this mic cause one day i’ll put these bars to rest
named it “fearz” cause i didn’t know what to call this mess
mix of insecurities, and doubts, trying to prolong the end
managing to find a sound i like just to fail and suddenly i’m lost again
at least i got some talent and delivery to grace my words
if i want to bring fear i need to face mine first
they nominated 6 to carry in a plain white he-rs-
i feel the need to go but it ain’t my turn
the truth of the matter is that i’m terrified
cause i feel i wasted years preparin’ rhymes
when it comes to beating the odds, i want the world to consider legible the paradigm
i’m terrified of never being discovered
i’m terrified that i’ll be deep into trouble
i’m terrified i’ll be too deep in the shuffle
and never finding out my piece in the puzzle
i’m terrified of never reaching the public
i’m terrified of never getting recognition
when i’m pennin’ every written with my tears
guess i’ll live forever with the fear
–
wait

(verse 4)
in the studio when gramma called
she said: “i know you’re a busy guy
i’m asking for hand, that’s all”
a tree had fell on her porch
last night it rained, and broke off in the storm
she asked me if i could take care of it and i said, “oh of course
next week it’s a plan” i thought
then i said “oh man i forgot
tomorrow i got a session at the studio, there’s a record that i gotta record
but i’ll get to it, plus i’ll be out of town in a few days so my week’s packed
i got a show down south and i don’t know when i’ll be back
2 weeks p-ssed- did an album with 13 tracks
perfectionist- so my old self had to think they’re trash
couldn’t stand to be in last
and have an album where things could clash
so every night i’d be in the lab
she sent a text so i ringed back
she said: “just checkin in, are you busy lately?
i know you got your music and other things but if you got this tree of mine it would be appreciated”
i rolled my eyes and told her “sure grandma i’ll do it as soon as i can”
but my mind said “this tree will be the least of your worries when i make it”
she sighed and said: “alright zach, i want you to have fun but i haven’t been feeling good lately and i might just pay to have it done
if i have to add a month” i said” “oh no it’s just this rappin’ stuff
is about to go somewhere- and i gotta get at it while i’m young”
she said: “ok i believe you, i know you’ll get to it”
i hung up and never thought about all the good things that she could influence
i just wanted to sit at home alone and start workin’ with producin’
i wish i knew what, i know now, how could i have been that stupid?
wait, wait
she sent a text a week later and said “i know your work is important
but could you please chop up this tree before the next storm hits?”
around that time i was finishing this album so i saw her text, almost ignored it
i texted back and said: “gram i ain’t got time lately
4 songs left and then i’m free, in the meantime maybe
i could hire a couple guys, make sure that it’s down for good
this album’s my top priority, bigger than how your house looks”
no response so i kept recording without fail
recording finished and fore i left i had a voice mail
i knew it was for the tree and mentally i was over this
finished the album and the preceding week i opened it
she said: “zach, you know that i love you very much
you’re too busy for me and i get that, fair enough
i just wanted to explain my intentions, had to clear it up
i know you’re living your dream
just make sure that you share the love
just started a new treatment, the 3 phases that i’ve went through
drug me through the dirt, but i ain’t gonna use my plight against you
my time is running out, that tree wasn’t a life issue
i could care less about it, i just wanted to spend some time with you
i feel like those beats that you make your rhymes fit to
the background, if only you knew how fast time slips you
if we never talk again, just know i’m right with you
i love you no matter what, zach i forgive you
dont feel guilty, i was just like you once
chasing aspirations, wasting time while you’re young
when i was your age i never guessed that i’d be 91
to get one extra day, i don’t know what i’d give up
dont let anything get in the way of of your dreams
but dont let your dreams get in the way of everything in between
i know you’ll have to be my age to get what that means, it’s endless
i love you zach, call me back when you get this”
i never did- and all the times i wasn’t there for her
looking back just makes me sick
i wasn’t prepared for the storm until it hit
until i got the call that she died september 26th
i don’t know what to do now
i took her for granted, mentally she was ruled out
if i’dda known i would pull that tree from its roots now
i’m sorry grandma, i know that i let you down
i never fixed that tree- but i made those songs
now her grave is soft and the rain it falls
one day was all it took to change thoughts
gave up final moments for something i’d enjoy a day tops
why didn’t i just do the dang job? god
mentally start to panic
i wasn’t there for her, experience took for granted
all she showed was love and in her last few weeks she was abandoned
i turned a blind eye to my hero when it was critical
one day can make you see your past worries as trivial
so from then on, every bar was written with my tears
waste of a life- because i lived in fear
please forgive me

- legible lyrics

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