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what if - koshir lyrics

[intro: koshir’s daughter]
h*llo daddy, i love you and i miss you

[verse 1]
the sh*t been typical, i seen the cycle
my pops ain’t sh*t and my mom’s a psycho
but they both got love for a seed with no light, though
meaning i ain’t grown up or turned on a lightbulb
i been f*cking sk*nks all my life, it’s trife though
with fakes all round me like, “that’s f*cking tight, bro!”
b*tches stroking egos, brain like a scrambled egg
crazy that i didn’t catch an std til 28
clap on, clap off, sh*t was brief
like the hangs i stole from walmart when i was a petty thief
graduated to a bum but i wasn’t living on a beach
i was surfing n*ggas’ couches, scrounging through they fridge to eat
stole my friend’s mom’s checkbook, bought a bunch of weed
partied with more bums who told me i was such a g
my whole adolescent life, i was such a piеce
then that sh*t circled round whеn i had a baby with a fiend

[hook]
what if i was to tell you i’m a deadbeat drug dealing piece of sh*t daddy with a bad habit?
what if i was to tell you that i love to drink the pain away and my f*cking uncle was a crack addict?
what if i was to tell you i was part the reason that my kid’s mom been shooting up that mad sh*t?
what if i told you that the only reason i ain’t k!lled myself twice is cuz my daughter need her breakfast?
[verse 2]
i be walking round feeling like my life a f*cking mess
and all my family tell me “give it up, we get it, you can rap
but boy, that sh*t ain’t paying bills and you ain’t got no f*cking wheels
30 years old renting cars and selling oxy pills?”
life of an artist, i guess that sh*t is ill
when you 80k invested and you still just talking deals
with some people out in cali living wealthy in the valley
and they know about me ‘cept i’m saying i’m for real?
most days i’m like, “f*ck these f*ggots!”
if they had some common sense, they would love my baggage
all the drama that surround me is a publicist’s dream
so why the f*ck they acting scary bout a budget for me? hmm…
nowadays, i ain’t even been partying
all i wanna do is make this money and ferraris then
grip like atari fans, i’m out for cash, b*tch
and i ain’t ever changed, you can tell by my outfits

[verse 3]
sick and tired of being so sick and tired
and seeing wack motherf*ckers with zero talent get shine
i’m reaching back to a time when reaching back with a vine
and smacking sh*t outta n*ggas was practically f*cking fine
when music was still alive and business wasn’t so shady
smoking wasn’t a crime and young women were ladies
point being, the world i been living in got me crazy
i been every f*cking thing except lazy, feel me?
daily i be lost, stressed out to the maximum
paranoid that past is coming back to get the best of them
if y’all ain’t got to message it, grown n*ggas bleed they estrogen
the type of sh*t that make you ask why the parents were so reckless
got illies on my mouth so i ain’t got time to sit and flex a bit
my schedule is not flexible due to your lack of excellence
and i’m p*ssed off for the both of us like “f*ck what you be packing, b*tch
go hit up ups if you want a job hailing packages!”
[hook]
what if i was to tell you i’m a deadbeat drug dealing piece of sh*t daddy with a bad habit?
what if i was to tell you that i love to drink the pain away and my f*cking uncle was a crack addict?
what if i was to tell you i was part the reason that my kid’s mom been shooting up that mad sh*t?
what if i told you that the only reason i ain’t k!lled myself twice is cuz my daughter need her breakfast?

- koshir lyrics

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