don't be slappin' my penis - kollektivet lyrics
(intro)
are you ready man?
yeah, man
how do you feel?
i feel like a man
well, man. let’s hit this club
yeah. let’s go
the men have arrived
(verse 1)
feelin fine
in the club with my fella’
fillin’ the club with a lotta’
testosterone
yeah. that’s the male hormone
basic biology, b-tch
that’s right, you’re the man
who’s the man?
you’re the man
no, you’re the man
am i the man?
yes
thank you, man
catch, motherf-cker, here’s a beer for your face
ahh, i spilled it all over the place
what is that?
are you flirting with me?
you know perfectly that
it looks like pee
whoa hey, let me open that beer for you, sister
you need to twist it, mister
are you okay?
ask my masculinity
i felt like a man, now i feel like a sissy
my t-st-cl-s are shrinking, and i am thinking
that it feels like i’ve been…
slapped on my p-n-s
(chorus)
don’t be slapping my p-n-s (x8)
(verse 2)
don’t call me cute, i am tough
i’m the boss when i drive
i got the magic touch
i have a manly way to touch down the clutch
pressing it in, with the ease of a lover
driving past the ladies, i’m gonna show her
don’t be slappin’ my…
buying new shoes to match my p-n-s-size
how about these? just name the prize
they’re too big for you
are you slappin’ me?
i’m sick and tired of this slappin’-spree
on the lowrider bike i’m the champion
you forgot to bring your helmet, son
don’t be slappin’ my p-n-s
i’m a handy man, we’re talking complex constructions
maybe you should have read the instructions
don’t be slappin’ my p-n-s, no no
girl, don’t be talking like a baby to me
i don’t like that cuz i meh mi mi me
don’t be slappin’ my p-n-s
don’t be slappin’ my p-n-s
don’t you dare slappin’ my p-n-s
i’m at the doctor to check my stuff
she just can’t seem to get enough
yes, doctor lady, s-x-machine is the answer
sir, it looks like you have testicular cancer
don’t be slappin’ my p-n-s
(chorus 2)
don’t be slappin’ my p-n-s (x6)
it’s not a b-ss guitar
don’t be slappin’ my p-n-s
when i order salad, don’t order steak
my b-lls start to shiver, my p-n-s shakes
don’t call these muscles baby-fat
don’t slap my p-n-s with a baseball bat
you slap my p-n-s dignity
when you make jokes about my virginity
in fact it feels like it’s not intact
it’s turning into something vagine-ish and abstract
(outro)
now you know how we feel
yeah, we shared our feelings, man
wait, did we just slap our own p-n-s?
stop the song!
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