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not okay - kojo-trip lyrics

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[chorus]
tears in my eyes as i write this song (song)
i don’t even know if i’ma make it back home (home)
lately i been second-guessing all my moves
though i don’t admit it, really miss my mom (mom)
lotta people questioning this path i’m on (on)
off the drugs i get up in the booth i’m gone (gone)
struggling a lot but i just keep my cool
tell them that i’m fine, knowing well i’m not (not)

[verse 1]
i deal with a lot, i’ve been gone off the pot
not a day that goes by that i don’t think of my pops
they’d rather hear me pop sh-t than hear me speak of my truth
but i ain’t finna talk ‘bout jewels like it’s something i got
though it’s all that i drop
they’d rather listen to that fake sh-t
k!lling all these tracks, now i’m running outta patience
i’ve been looking up to god asking if i’d make it
all about the logic, dropping cues to what that b-ss is
been afraid to face it, wonder what my fate is
tussling with faith, at times it feel like god is faceless
am i on his wait list, will he show his greatness
losing hope in love, kinda feel i’m on his hate list

[chorus]
tears in my eyes as i write this song (song)
i don’t even know if i’ma make it back home (home)
lately i been second-guessing all my moves
though i don’t admit it, really miss my mom (mom)
lotta people questioning this path i’m on (on)
off the drugs i get up in the booth i’m gone (gone)
struggling a lot but i just keep my cool
tell them that i’m fine, knowing well i’m not (not)

[verse 2]
who am i if i ain’t true to myself?
all the times that i belittled myself
pull up with the bars, the only time they hitting my cell
if it wasn’t for the raps, might not believe in myself, uh
i been in and outta love, left a hole inside my heart
had to bring this to the light, my thoughts they keep on getting dark
hope you put this in your carts, i’m just tryna play my part
telling stories ‘bout my life with flows that’ll flood up noah’s ark
this is all i know, all i know
tryna feed my family before i go
kicking all these raps just to reach my goals
music is the only the only thing that feeds my soul
yeah i know i’m not the only one
i been tryna get a grip, tryna be a obi-wan
i’m my father’s only son
settling my debts, i ain’t tryna hear you owe me one
still i’m showing love to those that showed me none
if i did it then i had to, shouts to my platoon
if you wish me blessings then i wish it right back atchu
if you ever had my back then you should know i gotchu
it ain’t nothing, that’s just what the real do

[chorus]
tears in my eyes as i write this song (song)
i don’t even know if i’ma make it back home (home)
lately i been second-guessing all my moves
though i don’t admit it, really miss my mom (mom)
lotta people questioning this path i’m on (on)
off the drugs i get up in the booth i’m gone (gone)
struggling a lot but i just keep my cool
tell them that i’m fine, knowing well i’m not (not)

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