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i'm not a real doctor - klezmergord lyrics

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you woke up in the morning and you’re feeling kinda empty
and you think you’re dying cause you typed your symptoms in webmd
you’ve got nausea and headaches, diahorreah after eating
it could pancreatitis except for the vomiting
but don’t quote me cause i’m not a real doctor

if it’s serious, don’t be remiss, call a qualified professional if the symptoms persist

you’ve got muscle cramp, fatigue and genital numbness
it might be hypothyroidism or just general dumbness
you post pictures of your booty cause you wanna be famous
but еveryone can see you have a pеrforated *n*s
but don’t quote me cause i’m not a real doctor

i’m the mvp of hpv
if your b*lls are sore get them castrated
if your feeling thirsty get yourself hydrated

you got a shotgun wound on the side of you head
so in my professional opinion you are already dead
but don’t quote me cause i’m not a real doctor
i’m not a real dentist either
i’m not that smart don’t flatter me
got all of my medical knowledge from grey’s anatomy
i dropped out of a phd in sociology

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