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king monkey rapp - king monkey lyrics

back up on the mountains, ’bout 4,000 feet
down in the jungle was a coconut tree
sw*ngin’ on a branch up under the sun
lived a bad little monkey called jojo gun
a bad motherf*cker if you ever saw one
he was sittin’ under the tree jackin’ off
with nothing to do and nowhere to go
he said “i think i’ll get the whole jungle in a godd*mn uproar”
just then he saw a lion passed by and he wiped the cum off his hand
he said “now there’s a bad motherf*cker i just can’t stand”
i can be down to the creek so thirsty i’m about to faint
but i have to step back and let this big motherf*cker get him a godd*mn drink
he said “hey brother lion, there’s a motherf*cker been talkin’ about you in a h*lluva way
he said some things i’m d*mn near scared to say
i know he couldn’t have possibly have been your friend
because he spoke of the shape that your family was in
he said your daddy was a b*st*rd and your mama was a ho
and you could eat p*ssy, but it wasn’t for sure
he talked about your mama and your daddy so bad
that when he started talkin’ about your sister it even made me mad
i don’t know what you’re gonna do
but i’d go down there and see that big motherf*cker if i was you”
the lion looked up in the tree
he said “tell me who this bad motherf*cker is that’s been talkin’ about me”
jojo said “you don’t wanna start no rumble
’cause he’s the biggest son of a b*tch in the whole wide jungle”
the lion tried to reach and grab jojo by his tail
got mad and went roaring through the jungle trail
with his head held high and his back drooped low
his tail was poppin’ like a ’44
knockin’ coconuts off the trees
even knocked a long ass giraffe down to his motherf*ckin’ knees
he ran up under the elephant under the coconut tree
he said “put up your deuce motherf*cker ’cause you got to tussle with me”
the lion looked at him outta the corner of his eye
he said “motherf*cker don’t come down here with no [?]”
he said “last night a motherf*cker tried to take my life
i got home this morning found that same motherf*cker in the bed with my wife
so from that tip you should plainly see
that this is a bad time to be f*cking with me
but if you insist, i will oblige
’cause i’m gonna try to change the color of your motherf*ckin’ hide”
now jojo was yellin’ leo, say go knock him down
say h*ll he don’t outweigh you by 10,000 pounds
then leo fired a short uppercut
the elephant took his snout and grabbed a coconut
then leo shot a beautiful short right cross
that’s when that coconut landed up against his jaw
misused his rib, just f*cked up his face
broke his collarbone and knocked his ass out of place
they fought furious all that day
it’s still a mystery how that lion got away
now the hoot owl come back and report what he saw
but he was a lyin’ motherf*cker when he called it a draw
say you went down there with some sh*t from the books
but the sh*t switched on you and you got your ass whooped
your eyes all black and your nose all blue
that elephant beat the sh*t out of you
my old lady told me ‘fore you left
i could probably whoop your ass my godd*mn self
and don’t come tellin’ me that sh*t about you beat
’cause me and your old lady had a ringside seat
now you’re comin’ back here lookin’ like [?]
with a swolled up head and a f*cked up body
said a motherf*cker don’t you rope
’cause i might swing out on this limb and beat your ass some more
jojo was jumpin’ on a limb up and down
his foot missed the limb and his ass hit the ground
like a bolt of lightnin’ in a streak of heat
the lion was on jojo’s ass with all four feet
jojo said “what a minute mr. lion, say you didn’t raise no h*ll
every motherf*cker in the jungle saw you jump on me after i fell
you let me get my nuts out of the sand
and i will fight your ass like a natural man
better still if i get my feet on solid ground
i’ll fight you close range for 15 rounds
now leo jumped back for a great big fight
that d*mn monkey hung on a limb and jumped d*mn near out of sight
far as anybody could see
jojo had his ass up in a coconut tree
he said “i’m gone motherf*cker, but i’ll be back soon”
i’m sittin’ down in the jungle to get my cousin baboon
and the baboon was 30 miles in the jungle shootin’ pool
when the rabbit broke in and gave him that bad news
the baboon hung his stick upside the wall
he said “i gotta go people, cousin monkey just had a h*lluva downfall
he’s the smartest one in the family, seem like my brother
you know i got to go when that sonab*tch get in some trouble”
so back there at the fight there was the elephant, the raccoon, the tiger and the bear
the bear motherf*ckers was the first one there
jojo jumped out of the middle of the tree
jumped in the middle of the ring and began to rumble
said “y’all have gathered from far and near
to see one of the godd*mnest fights of the year
you all know leo is the king of his crew
oh, but my cousin baboon is a bad motherf*cker too”
baboon went to go to the corner to get him a little hit
the lion jumped on his back and gave him a godd*mn fit
rippin’ up his back, tore up his mane
tore his ass up worse than a choo*choo train
the monkey saw what was happenin’ and ran and jumped behind the stump
said “i’ll be godd*mn cousin baboon done come down here drunk
i got to go get my clothes and get out of these sticks
he’ll be at my house in a minute they think i started this sh*t”
baboon was layin’ on the ground
he looked up in the face of leo lion
he said “please leo, don’t hit me no more in my face
hadn’t been for that monkey i wouldn’t have been f*ckin’ with you in the first place”
he said “if somebody lead the way down to his house
we’ll see what this sh*t started all about”
but when they got there the monkey left and put a note on the door
said all you c*cksuckers and motherf*ckers if you’re lookin’ for me
i’m down in the jungle in the highest tree
i’m down there with my cousin gorilla, he weights 985 pounds
and there ain’t a sonab*tch in the jungle that ever knocked him down

the monkey saw what was happenin’ to cousin baboon and he ran and jumped behind the stump
he said i’ll be godd*mn if cousin baboon done come down here drunk
i shoulda known by the way that motherf*cker was stankin’
that he had been doin’ a whole lot of drinkin’
i gotta go home and get my clothes and get out of these sticks
they gonna be up my ass in a minute, see they think i started this sh*t
jojo went home and he told his old lady
he said “honey, pack your clothes and pack ’em quick”
brought baboon and [?] in the jungle pullin’ a b*tch
they out there fightin’ like two motherf*ckers
say it wouldn’t surprise me if they k!lled each other
let’s get our clothes and get out of these sticks
they’ll be down here in a minute, they think i started this sh*t
back there at the fight the baboon was layin’ on the ground
he looked up at the face of leo lion
he said “please leo don’t”

- king monkey lyrics

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