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100 proof rubbing alcohol - king bird lyrics

**intro**
so the other day, somebody asked me
“hey, what’s your pref* drink of choice?”
i said “well, you’re not gonna like my answer, but… here it goes”

**chorus**
100 proof rubbing alcohol
is all
that i drink
100 proof rubbing alcohol
i don’t really care what you think

**verse 1**
pure purell, let me paint a mural for you
i been drinkin moonshine, and sodom and gamora
explorer, like dora, i be seeing more and more
yeah i got a horde of lords and drunken nords in northern california
and i gotta warn you, when i do adorn you with this crown of th*rns
i’m bound to scorn ya, eggs scrambled cream of corn ya
i am the notorious web md
and i’m climbin up the walls like i’m stuck at homes deep

**verse 2**
yeah, yeah
this will be the last time you get a second chance
check it, kid wanted to tango, we let him dance
home wreckers, divorce papers up in my pants bro
forever meet your maker upon your land
pull up in that drop*top bike, what it do?
i don’t wanna drink it if it’s not 100 proof
i’ve been sippin on this rubbing and i’m feeling wonderful
i can’t even f*ckin understand you, shut up dude
(come on man, i know you’re not listening to the song right now
could you please shut up? just be quiet? thank you.)

**verse 3**
i be pluckin the mandolin like i’m fluent in mandarin
if you let the kid handle it, you should go buy some bandages
catch me up in the captain’s pit i feel like i’m zapp brannigan
i finesse medicinal liquor out of my mama’s cabinet

**chorus**
100 proof rubbing alcohol
is all
that i drink
100 proof rubbing alcohol
i don’t really care what you think

**outro**
so then he says to me, you know, “what, like actual rubbing alcohol, like rubbbing* like antiseptic stuff?”
like yeah, yeah, you know, what? some people like white wine, some people like red wine, some people like whiskey, and myself? i’m a rubbing alcohol kind of guy
what can i say? people are just different
he said “but, uh, 100 proof… i don’t think that there is such a thing as 100 proof rubbing alcohol”
i said “well, that’s what you think”

- king bird lyrics

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