disorderly - kameron tovey lyrics
[verse 1]
prevent my own sleep
producing pretended parables in my mind
give into defeat
to grasp a grain of gratitude for my time
i don’t want to be here, it doesn’t feel right
but maybe if i trick myself i can get over this fright
[chorus]
it’s disorderly of me
to disengage from conversation when i feel the need
it’s controlling me i feel
the echoing, it stops the flow, my thoughts are hindering
if i just became ordinary
i could live my life so differently
it’s disorderly of me
to be the person i was born to be
[verse 2]
my thoughts, they race at a moment’s notice
i can never sit down and just smell the roses
my n.m.e. it comes from within
“no more excuses” i can hear it sing
i never get a chance to just catch my breath
cause every time i try, i blink and forget
this truly agonizing daily struggle
it’s just way, way, way too much for me to juggle
[bridge]
can’t get the words out of my mouth
can’t imagine how many takes this will amount
my lips too slow, or my mind’s too quick
all i know is that i stumble, and i look like a pr*ck!
{chorus}
it’s disorderly of me
to disengage from conversation when i feel the need
it’s controlling me i feel
the echoing, it stops the flow, my thoughts are hindering
if i just became ordinary
i could live my life so differently
it’s disorderly of me
to be the person i was born to be
[verse 3]
look in the mirror, and what do i see?
an emotional wreck bursting at the seams
it’s like i bottle it up, and i don’t even know
nothing turns to something, and i’m crying alone
i can’t leave the house with a level head
the fear of interaction brings me constant dread
it hurts to even think about the things i’ll get wrong
but that’s exactly why i’m turning all this into a song
[chorus]
it’s disorderly of me
to disengage from conversation when i feel the need
it’s controlling me i feel
the echoing, it stops the flow, my thoughts are hindering
if i just became ordinary
i could live my life so differently
it’s disorderly of me
to be the person i was born to be
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