how to hate you - julia shappy lyrics
[verse 1]
it was an accident
i didn’t mean to fall this hard
hit my head and now the thought of you
can fill my eyes with stars
just get it over with
if you’re gonna leave, then lock the door
and i’ll just sit here feeling everything
from my bedroom floor
i’m rereading our old messages
i check in on all our mutual friends
just in case someone says your name
i still cling to the careless things you’d say
the cracks in my heart keep me awake
i can’t keep going on this way
[chorus]
so i tell myself that i don’t need you
i’ll say it ’til it’s true
til i get over you
i’ll convince myself i’m bеtter off
i’ll stop looking at the moon
and wondering what you’rе up to
and someday i’ll learn how to hate you
[verse 2]
i’m missing the way you’d want me
i’m grieving the way you used to care
now i feel crazy how it all just vanished
right into thin air
i take advice from strangers i meet online
i need the universe to give me a godd*mn sign
cause i can’t keep putting up this fight
[chorus]
so i tell myself that i don’t need you
i’ll say it ’til it’s true
til i get over you
i’ll convince myself i’m better off
i’ll stop looking at the moon
and wondering what you’re up to
and someday i’ll learn how to hate you
[bridge]
i play it off and tell the world that i’m fine
i’ve gotten good at putting on the disguise
i could’ve loved you for the longest time
don’t wanna cry for something that isn’t mine
but you hardly ever leave my mind
i could’ve loved you for the rest of my life
so i’ll dye my hair
and change my clothes
then i’ll leave this town
find a new postal code
far away
so i stop seeing you
i can turn into
a brand new person
change everything
to k!ll the version of myself
that’s still in love with you
[chorus]
so i tell myself that i don’t need you
i’ll say it ’til it’s true
til i get over you
but when it gets late
and i get lonely
i look up at the moon
and wonder what you’re up to
but someday i’ll learn how to hate you
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