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a little priest - josh groban & annaleigh ashford lyrics

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[mrs. lovett, spoken]
that’s all very well. what’re we gonna do about him?

[todd, spoken]
later on, when it’s dark, we’ll take him to some secret place and bury him.

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
well, of course, we could do that. i don’t suppose he’s got any relatives going to come poking around looking for him. you know me, bright ideas just pop into my head and i keep thinking…

(sung)
seems a downright shame

[todd, spoken]
shame?

[mrs. lovett]
seems an awful waste…
such a nice plump frame
wot’s*his*name
has…
had…
has…
nor it can’t be traced

business needs a lift
debts to be erased
think of it as thrift
as a gift…
if you get my drift…
no?
seems an awful waste
i mean
with the price of meat what it is
when you get it
if you get it—

[todd, spoken]
ha ha ha!

[mrs. lovett]
good, you got it
take, for instance
mrs. mooney and her pie shop
business never better, using only p*ssycats and toast
and a p*ssy’s good for maybe six or seven at the most
and i’m sure they can’t compare as far as taste…

[todd]
mrs. lovett
what a charming notion
eminently practical
and yet appropriate as always

[mrs. lovett]
well, it does seem a waste

[todd]
mrs. lovett
how i’ve lived without you all these years
[mrs. lovett]
it’s an idea

[todd]
i’ll never know!
how delectable!
also undetectable
how choice!
how rare!

[mrs. lovett]
think about it
lots of other gentlemen’ll
soon be coming for a shave
won’t they?
think of
all them
pies!

[todd]
for what’s the sound of the world out there?

[mrs. lovett]
what, mr. todd, what, mr. todd
what is that sound?
[todd]
those crunching noises pervading the air?

[mrs. lovett]
yes, mr. todd, yes, mr. todd
yes, all around

[todd]
it’s man devouring man, my dear—

[todd & mrs. lovett]
and who are we to deny it in here?

[todd, spoken]
ah, these are desperate times, mrs. lovett. and desperate measures are called for.

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
here we are, hot from the oven.

[todd, spoken]
what is that?

[mrs. lovett]
it’s priest
have a little priest

[todd]
is it really good?

[mrs. lovett]
sir, it’s too good, at least
then again, they don’t commit sins of the flesh
so it’s pretty fresh

[todd]
awful lot of fat

[mrs. lovett]
only where it sat

[todd]
haven’t you got poet
or something like that?

[mrs. lovett]
no, you see the trouble with poet
is how do you know it’s
deceased?
try the priest

[todd, spoken]
mm, heavenly.

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
ah.

[todd, spoken]
not as hearty as bishop, perhaps, but then not as bland as curate, either.

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
and good for business—always leaves you wanting more. trouble is, we only get it in sundays…

(sung)
lawyer’s rather nice

[todd]
if it’s for a price

[mrs. lovett]
order something else, though, to follow
since no one should swallow
it twice

[todd]
anything that’s lean

[mrs. lovett]
well, then, but if you’re british and loyal
you might enjoy royal
marine
anyway, it’s clean
though of course, it tastes of wherever it’s been

[todd]
is that squire
on the fire?

[mrs. lovett]
mercy no, sir
look closer
you’ll notice it’s grocer

[todd]
looks thicker
more like vicar

[mrs. lovett]
no, it has to be grocer—it’s green

[todd]
the history of the world, my love

[mrs. lovett]
save a lot of graves
do a lot of relatives favors…

[todd]
is those below serving those up above

[mrs. lovett]
everybody shaves
so there should be plenty of flavors…

[todd]
how gratifying for once to know—

[todd & mrs. lovett]
that those above will serve those down below!

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
now, let’s see…
we’ve got tinker

[todd, spoken]
something pinker

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
mm, tailor?

[todd, spoken]
mm, paler

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
potter?

[todd, spoken]
hotter

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
butler?

[todd, spoken]
subtler

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
locksmith?

(sung)
lovely bit of clerk

[todd]
maybe for a lark

[mrs. lovett]
then again, there’s sweep
if you want it cheap
and you like it dark

try the financier—
peak of his career

[todd]
that looks pretty rank

[mrs. lovett]
well, he drank
it’s a bank
cashier

last one really sold
wasn’t quite so old

[todd]
have you any beadle?

[mrs. lovett]
next week, so i’m told
beadle isn’t bad till you smell it
and notice how well it’s
been greased
stick to priest

(spoken)
now this may be a bit stringy, but then again, it’s fiddle player.

[todd, spoken]
ah, no, no, no, that’s not fiddle player. that’s piccolo player.

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
how can you tell?

[todd, spoken]
because it’s piping hot.

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
then blow on it first!

[todd]
the history of the world, my sweet

[mrs. lovett]
oh, mr. todd, ooh, mr. todd
what does it tell?

[todd]
is who gets eaten, and who gets to eat

[mrs. lovett]
and, mr. todd, too, mr. todd
who gets to sell

[todd]
but fortunately, it’s also clear—

[todd & mrs. lovett]
that everybody
goes down well with beer

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
since marine doesn’t appeal to you, how about rear admiral?

[todd, spoken]
too salty. i prefer general.

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
with or without his privates? wi— “with” is extra.

[todd, spoken]
what is that?

[mrs. lovett]
it’s fop
finest in the shop
or we have some shepherd’s pie peppered
with actual shepherd
on top
and i’ve just begun
here’s the politician; so oily
it’s served with a doily—
have one?

[todd]
put it on a bun
well, you never know if it’s going to run

[mrs. lovett]
try the friar
fried, it’s drier

[todd]
no, the clergy is really
too co*rs* and too mealy

[mrs. lovett]
then actor—
that’s compacter

[todd]
yes, and always arrives overdone
i’ll come again when you
have judge on the menu

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
wait! true, we don’t have judge yet, but we’ve got something you might fancy even better.

[todd, spoken]
what’s that?

[mrs. lovett, spoken]
executioner.

[todd]
have charity towards the world, my pet

[mrs. lovett]
yes, yes, i know, my love

[todd]
we’ll take the customers that we can get

[mrs. lovett]
high*born and low, my love

[todd]
we’ll not discriminate great from small
no, we’ll serve anyone—

[mrs. lovett]
meaning anyone—

[todd & mrs. lovett]
and to anyone
at all!

- josh groban annaleigh ashford lyrics

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