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‏‎parasite - ‏‏‎jordanisdead lyrics

verse 1:

looking at myself and all i really see is you
slicing skin, i’ll replace my face until it’s new
a life accepting fate is better spent than life of running
but i find freedom in blindly running till i’m nothing

obsessive thoughts, the habits that i caused
i try to cherish time we had and not resent the time we lost
i left home, i miss my family when im gone
i wonder if without them, am i even strong?

i see your habits in my actions, the parallels im scared to tell
i don’t believe in mе no more, prepared to fail
i didn’t do it for thе playlists or the product placements
i did it until i became my favorite

now i wonder if this living’s even worth it
if i can’t make a song that i consider perfect
i fear i live along the brim of saying way too much
and saying not enough, do i deserve your trust?

i dread the moment paths will cross, a ghost i can’t escape
she’s a fragment of my past that im scared to face
saw her in my hometown bar, and i left without a trace
she’s a phantom of the sins that i just can’t erase
i know i need to make amends but i can’t find the strength
can i live life with the guilt or can i live it safe?
the warmth of sunlight became nothing more than just an echo
as im holding on to everything that i can’t seem let go

hook:

no, oh
no, oh
no, oh
no, oh

verse 2:

i been watching parts of me i love the most just fade away
and i wish that i had the strength to break the blade
i wanted to be superhero, fantasize to save the day
but i’m tethered to the walls of this cage i made

my brittle bones are weathered and i can’t hold it together
im falling apart so i can’t promise you forever
paradise or paradigm, scared of life or scared of time
parasitic paradox, im scared to live and scared to die

i wish i had the talent that i fake, yea
i wish i had the balance that i hate, nah
perhaps my privilege permitted me to drown in the illusion
i been so focused on fiction i forgot that you are human
i wish i could rescind the resentment that i just i hide in
the sweater that you gave me, that’s the same one that i fly in
my brother wrote a message in the blood, and sent the letter
he said make sure to sever ties that don’t hold you together (f*ck)

sometimes my faith misguided by my race
sometimes my fate is blinded by this maze
sometimes i cower in a tower, i’m afraid
sometimes i hesitate to leave without a trace, yea

sometimes i wonder if this is forever
if this bond can really stay together with no tether
sometimes i wonder if our blood defines our love
if i can love my friend more than a cousin i don’t trust

sometimes i wonder if i made the right decisions
if i gave up, i wouldn’t live life fighting prisons
sometimes i’m petrified that they will clip my wings
if they will slice my tongue so i can never live to sing

sometimes i question insecurity
i wonder if you feel better while you are hurting me
sometimes i bleed attempting to be perfect
sometimes i breathe and question if it’s worth it

hook:
no, oh (worth it)
hold on, hold on, hold on, i can’t let go
no, oh
hold on, hold on, hold on, i can’t let go (go)
no, oh
hold on, hold on, hold on, i can’t let go (let go, parasite)
no, oh
hold on, hold on, hold on, i can’t let go (go)
no, oh
hold on, hold on, hold on, i can’t let go (go)
no, oh
hold on, hold on, hold on, i can’t let go (go)
no, oh
hold on, hold on, hold on, i can’t let go (let it go, parasite)
no, oh
hold on, hold on, hold on, i can’t let go

outro:

no, oh
no, oh
no, oh
no, oh

- jordanisdead lyrics

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