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violent christmas carols - jon cozart lyrics

[verse 1: winter wonderland]
children scream
are you listening?
radiate
skin is glistening
it’s ash from the skies
a permanent night
a walk through nuclear winter wonderland
trees aglow
feeling festive
as we grow
an extra teste
it won’t go to waste
as we repopulate
walking through nuclear winter wonderland

[verse 2: frosty the snowman]
oh
frosty the snowman
knew the sun was hot that day
so he said “let’s run”
“kids, we’ll have some fun”
“now before i melt away**”
(gags)
his eerie face froze into place
the sеntience stripped away
hе woke and spewed a brownish goo
o’er the kids packed in their sleigh
oh
frosty the snowman
purged the contents of his brain
and his iq dropped seven points per drop
as he retched in gruesome pain
the children came to hear each day
the puddle’s garbled shrieks
and though his cries for his mother died
the frothing never ceased
oh
frosty the snowman
just a fairytale they say
but the images witnessed by those kids
will haunt them to their graves
[verse 3: carol of the bells]
hark! we’re in h*ll
hot flaming h*ll
lake is aflame
skin melting pain
rise from abyss, six sixty six
everyone in polycotton blends
hitler is hotboxed with pol pot
using epstein as a latrine
takis to eat, monster to drink
mark of the beast, biden vaccine
grandpa’s in h*ll for not tipping well
ladies who scream, all karening
g*yly they sing
h0m*s and queens
songs out of fear
lucifer’s here
no one’s celebrating freaking christmas
grandpa really should’ve tipped the waitress
on, on they scream eternally
on without end
with bin laden

[verse 4: jingle bells]
slashing through the snow
with the sole intent to slay
o’er the kids we roll
laughing all the way
helpless children scream
little limbs’ll fly
what fun it is to ride and sing
on a slaying song tonight
oh*h*h*h
jingle bells, prison cells
no one gets away
oh, what fun it is to die
from a blood*soaked horse’s sleigh
[verse 5: rockin’ around the christmas tree]
glockin’ around the christmas tree
at the family yankee swap
cameltoe hung where you can see
while the grandma asks
[unknown voice]: “what is wap”

[verse 6: up on the housetop]
[jon cozart:]
up in the big house santa sits
awaiting out three prison stints
caught stuffing stocking, paid the price
post up in folsom, ten to life
ho, ho, ho, his clique in tow
ho, ho, ho, his clique in tow
up in the big house
clink, clink, clink
[jon cozart, rapped]:
slaying his bunkmate behind the sink
roll through the blocking with the kringle klan
bringing the guards with a couple grahams
in a whiff of swedish fish
thanks to the misses’ gorilla grip
ho, ho, ho, his sack in tow
ho, ho, ho, his sack in tow
up in the big house
cl!ck, cl!ck, cl!ck
best pay your dues up to good saint crip

- jon cozart lyrics

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