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thus far, pt. 1 - johniepee lyrics

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[intro]
yeah
ayy, it’s almost here
[?] let’s go
yeah, ayy, ayy

[verse 1]
the year started with a crash and a bang, was holding the white flag
left my city life for a moment, knowing i’d fly back
to everything i’d built, tryna get a feel for the right track
but i’d ignored the signs, so was only fitting that i crashed
axle snapped in the dirt, i was lost and stranded with
two hands to my face and my girl who’s handling dismantlement well
abandoning whatever the plans we had imagined and h-ll
while i’m praying we would make it out alive, time would tell
yeah, ain’t it funny how our plans change?
we set it up the way we want it, hold it, then the dam breaks
we’re cut but then we patch it up, to heal it like a bandaid
but everything it happens for a reason, so the man says
there’s beauty in the struggle, uprooting, manoeuvres who woulda thought
that the dude who grew into something through moving views would’ve stumbled when coming back to the place where he knew it all
or so he thought, but he didn’t, the time it was ticking to lead him back home

[verse 2]
now i’m back in the city she never seen before
nothing’s changed but everything’s different, everyone sleeping on the 6k
dunno how we’ll make it but we’ll find a way
i’m feeling like i wanna hide away and live in prior days
but times have changed, and so i have i in major minor ways
i left when i was 19 pipe dreamin’ of brighter days
i’m not the insecure, acne ravaged kid that i was before
and as a man in-act a plan to do away with childish ways
’cause now i’ve found purpose
i had to leave home to find it, but now the doubts surface
they weigh me down, but i’m climbing and pumping out verses
the more i’m working, i’m finding that i can build the environment to make it all worth it
don’t really vibe churches, but i’m believing in god
demons ain’t sleeping for long, but it seems they like lurking
upon my shoulders, but i shake ’em off and try to breathe
while tryna grow this something outta nothing, like a mustard seed

[verse 3]
yeah, but then i wake up
my stomach rumbling, i’ve made nothing off a pay stub
been stripped of everything, god he knows what i’m made of
’cause i’ve been slaving away, all without an hourly wage
with the debts all towering, caged, but no cowardly ways, been surmounting
with towers of page, before i’m out in a blaze, hope it pays off
no days off, wash my face in the basin
the day’s arrived better face it before my pages are vacant
i walk up straight into the kitchen and i’m sizzling bacon
tearing down the temple i built, ’cause where i live is adjacent
i’m punching holes up in the mirror ’cause i hate who i’m facing
erasing everything that made me who i am, feel i’m tracing
around my own chalk outline of my dead body
i live within this worn out mind, but where’s johnie?
the dude that you knew, he landed in sydney, he grew
he grew into something unusual never sitting in cubicles
instead his p-ssion for musicals overpowered the urinals
thinking his taking the p-ss, he writing till numb in his cuticles
he was stuck in a rut between curling up and pursuing all
nothing really caught his eye except for music, she beautiful
and i spent a couple years writing til filled with arthritis
i met my homie johnie called him ville the rest coincided
til i was rocking around the country with the pros so excited
handed me golden ticket shows and man the flame was ignited
but now it’s all just memories, heavily weighed on my brain
i’m living in perth, not sydney, really it’s like everything’s changed
six years, i was working, now it’s memory lane
i sit here, so uncertain, how i’ll ever regain
the position i felt i held but now it’s heavily strained
i’ma lesser version of myself, i’m lesser ev-er-y day
or so it feels, but know it’s real, i never left, i’m the same
so watch me move to higher ground, i float on ev-er-y page

[verse 4]
so i’m never defeated, my world upside down
and so i walk on the ceiling, what an incredible feeling
that i’m alive and well, my heart it is beating
the coolest cat, i dropped a couple lives, still land on my feet and then whats’s new?
i’ve always done this, snare and the drum kit
moving all over the map so quickly, been gripping the game ain’t a matter of whether a glove fits
staring’s for dumb kids, so i keep my blinders on
if i’m looking left and right, i trip, there’s a reminder john
i had to get in my groove, and now i’ve found it
good luck on trying to get me to move, see i’ve been making some room
for all i love, it let’s me do what i do
without anything or body getting in way of the tunes
so i’ma leave this a parting gift, we’re nearing the album
i was stuck up in the middle had me feeling like malcolm
it started rocky but asap you’ll be digging the outcome
started with nine lives, but when i lost one i found one

[outro]
sometimes you have to lose it all to gain everything
yeah
i’ll see you after the album
peace

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