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favorite things - john valby lyrics

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bl*w j*bs and hand jobs and eating cl*toris
watching your grandmother douche with lavoris
brown pubic hairs on toilet bowl rings
these are a few of my favorite things

serving bird droppings as warm appetizers
l!cking the residue from bathroom sanitizers
sanding the top of my d*ck ’til it stings
these are a few of my favorite things

probing my d*ck*hole with sharpened lead pencils
enlargening my assh0l* with kitchen utensils
knowing the joy that an egg beater brings
these are a few of my favorite things

when the dog bites
when the bee stings
when i’m feeling sad
i tell everybody i know to eat sh*t
and p**p on my presents
and then i don’t feel, i don’t feel bad at all
you f*cking scumbag, f*cking christmas sh*tbird
f*ck you!

- john valby lyrics

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