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talking tinky-winky blues - john mccutcheon lyrics

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let me tell you all a story
though i’m sure you’ve heard
if you’ve paid the least attention
then you’ve gotten the word
about the latest in america’s
favorite mix:
i’m talking
politics, religion and s-x
yeah boy, brought many a dinner party, talk show, and federal government to a grinding halt

it seems that there’s a preacher that’s
spending his days
channel surfing searching for
signs of g-ys
and he’s just uncovered something
that the rest of us missed
aimed at two year olds
and the guy is p-ssed
we’re talking televised brain washing directly from g-y control central!

teletubbies, tinky winky
you know the deal
he’s purple, he’s g-y
and i say, “get real!”
the color’s pink, jerry
and here’s further news:
if he’s g-y his purse would
match his shoes

plus, you’ve got the wrong issue
it seems to me
the question is
why should two year olds be watching tv?
but i know you’ve got a lot of
witch-hunting to do
so i thought i’d help you out
’cause you missed a few:
like:

-fred & barney: remember the song? “we’ll have a g-y old time”

-donald duck: “never wore any pants…spent a little too much time w/all those nephews, don’t you think?”

-batman & robin: wealthy single guy and younger man living in that big mansion, leading a double life, lots of tights and capes. come on…

-uncle sam: he’s your uncle, he wants you

-and, of course, the purple one himself: barney “i love you, you love me…” g-y

see, what i can’t figure
are his days so free
that he can waste ’em watching
all that kid’s tv?
we’d all be better off
if you’d just begin
preaching love and comp-ssion
instead of trolling for sin

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