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this is not me - joey contreras, george salazar lyrics

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silence, numbing
stop the, noisy
chatter in the head
needs something else instead
breathing
zoning

and i fly when i’m high and i soar out the door
and its calming
out looking in and i run into him and it’s haunting
so drawing
but this is not
me

searching
waiting
all the while, playing
they don’t think they know
putting on the show
curtain, closing

and i dream in between everyone’s public seeing
cause i’m lonely
and at night an excuse another chance to abuse
what i’m hiding
what i’m fighting
and he’ll say
“how are you today?”
and i see in his eyes
he thinks that we’re that way
i was gone i was f*cked
i was blacked out and drunk
okay?

don’t accuse me
don’t push me
don’t touch me
don’t love me

easy, leaving
brushing off the guilt
but deep down i feel
that maybe we are real

now i cry when i’m high
and i run to no one cause he’s hurting
guess the pain that i caused when
i’m not under a drug is long lasting

well screw it i’m fine
line up another line
and i’m growing
and i’m thriving
i’m the one who’s surviving
he’s so weak
and i will not coincide
this is not
me

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