former self - jerms rebell lyrics
i’ve got a score to settle with my former self
who told me to forfeit cause moving forward is more or less a scorching h-ll
tried to make me conform to ordinary, knowing i wasn’t close to regular
but rather special as what never was, a moment you only get once
i’d set my scope on a nebula, next second he’d be telling me, “forget it,”
cause i won’t get enough thrust, and i’d sweat it
but that’s just who i was before i knew who i was
a few new adjustments, had me clueless as to what i grew from, whod’a thunk?
from disrespect through the roof like not knowing when what’s due is up
to doing what i love, until i loved who i was
earlier times in my life there was stressing combined with strife
but now i reminisce with hindsight and recognize blessings in disguise
i’ve got a score to settle with my former self
put my heart into it like selling organs, despite the wretched torture he’d put me through
felt like an orphan getting sonned by never-ending negativity
there’s no debate just know he hurt me plenty see
i never minded haters cause i was my own worst enemy
playing it safe ended up in excessive insecurities
self esteem on empty resulted in being insufficient, lesser steam
the little engine that could, didn’t, getting on track was prevented
never dreamed, endlessly stressed, h-ll dwelled within me
or should i say him, couldn’t tell you the difference
we were pretty much identical as replica’s
said he’d do things for me that were never done
and so i
got ridiculed, felt miniscule
pitiful, ’till i refused his abuse and lit the fuse that made me pivotal
my decision never would be to choose to let him get through to the depth of who i was
turns out his chances were slim as he was shallow, so he dipped like a pool
still got a score to settle with my former self
i’m sure he’d guessed he’d reign/rain over me, and my parade, as my tears poured while i’d get drenched
acted full of himself with his tank on empty, last to merit, rather than last to merit
getting ahead of himself, running his mouth before he ran his errands
every now and then we have a run-in
tries to make comparisons to others
as if it matters but it doesn’t
so i’ve got to be careful of my judgment
cause that’s exactly what i’ve done to him…
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