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bad guy - jaypelb lyrics

i’m a bad person
at least that’s what i feel
you see an opportunity to help someone who’s sick
i see a chance to be a d*ck
i can’t change the way i am
but i feel like if i fake it till i make it i can be better
but what if some people aren’t meant to be better
i’m meant to be a hater
sh*t on billie ellish because my ex liked her
hate on your decisions cuz i don’t have enough confidence to make my own
i’d be willing to give away the little that i own if it means my cold heart would part from my chest
i wish i could be normal like the rest
but i’m just me
some people tell me to embrace it
write my poetry and ignore the hared
but i can’t ignore the hatred when its in my head
saying that i’m better off dead
telling me to grab a glock and fill myself with led
i’m fed up with dreams
i’m fed up with disappointment
but there is no cure
or no ointment

i’m just a bad guy, a bad guy
i’m just a bad person i don’t know why i try
make my girl cry, my girl cry
all i do is lie
i don’t know why i am how i am
wanna grab a gun and make it go blam
wanna grab a gun and make it go blam
make it go blam

wish i could go back to when i wasn’t suicidal every day
all mama wants to do is help my pain go away
maybe i should go back to the hospital
talk to a therapist about how i’m so non*committal in every relationship
my emotions like to do a flip
make my ego as hard as a brick
i swear i don’t know how i look in the mirror that long
the thought of talking to myself makes me sick
crack in the mirror
i feel my fear seeking out of my head
i’m getting sent to a bad place
somewhere worse than being dead
“h*llo joseph”
sh*t satan’s back inside my head
“you wonder why you are this way
but you should know
god didn’t influence your actions any day
he gave you free will i just manipulate it
now here take a seat
let me pull up a chair
your friend’s feelings are on a plate
would you like me to share?
you can stare at me in hatred all you want
but it still won’t change all the times you were a c*nt

- jaypelb lyrics

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