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what awaits me - jay rain (rapper) lyrics

[verse 1]
mother cried again another night
these nights seem to only bring us fights
knives fly around the room like flying kites
i try to shine but it’s hard to find the brightness inside
but cry i won’t
’cause i know it’s not worth spending my soul’s energy on
this will happen tomorrow
i’d rather cry sunday
so when i cry, i cry out all the sorrow
i don’t go to church, i don’t believe there’s someone above
but at my lowest, i’ll talk to god out of desperation
i try to keep in my hatred and save it for confrontation
i love to yell and go crazy on f*ckers hating
but if i could just weigh in, it’s not the best way in
to your heart and finding the parts to hеal, it’s hard
i know that, i gotta stay strong for when i go back
’cause i don’t wanna go black

[chorus]
i stare oncе again down the hallway
i know what awaits me
i stare once again down the hallway
i know what awaits me

[verse 2]
father cried again another night
these nights seem to only bring us fights
knives fly around the room like flying kites
i try to shine but there’s no brightness to find
i only reach a higher state of fright every time this happens
mother suggests a therapists for my sadness
he concludes i’ve got ocd and tics in masses
these forceful thoughts have come from all the madness
one day i just lose it
i leave my chair with a swift movement
then i walk back and forth fumin’
then i cry and my mind won’t do it
the things i ask, i feel inhumane
i start pulling my hairs and i’m losing
a battle with my body, it’s doing
whatever it wants and i can’t cool it
[chorus]
i stare once again down the hallway
i know what awaits me
i stare once again down the hallway
i know what awaits me
i stare once again down the hallway
i know what awaits me
i stare once again down the hallway
i know what awaits me

[outro]
*crying turns to laughter*
it’s okay johan
i’ll take it from here

- jay rain rapper lyrics

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