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calabasas rose - jason henshaw lyrics

[intro]
i’m sick of opening my heart
just for it to be torn apart
i’m sick of trusting what leaves
i’m losing trust in myself
i could never see past cloudy skies
a rainy reality pouring down in my life
i mean, i spent too much time chasing what isn’t mine
chasing what won’t grow when sown
i’m outta my mind
i’m hoping for a miracle fasho
i’m looking for someone who’ll walk with me out that door
remember when?

[verse 1]
back entrance with the hood up
eyes covered, lies floating around
they saw us arrive separate but leave together
all the questions, we can’t tell
between the flashes in the lights
i’ll see your eyes and know your shine is brighter
yeah you’re tired, i’m exhausted
we’ve been running through these hills
wondering how we lost ourselves
wondering if we can feel anything other than touch when pushing through the m-sses
i mean what happened
can you even tell!?
this is breaking me down

[verse 2]
all the pressure surrounding us
never knew there was doubt in us
i acknowledge the gray between sunny days and days of sorrow
stormy weather was better with our hearts together
now i have to fight to stay afloat alone
it ain’t fair how farewell was so costly
it’s the highest fare for the affair
polaroids starting to fade
never was a picture perfect photo
now, i’m holding onto memories and those are fading too
i don’t think we know what happened
still, we had

[verse 3]
rooftop evenings just to escape it all
above the chaos of the life we chose to live gazing at the moon and stars
their light among the world reminiscent of yours
they never could compare
appearing to go on for infinity, but there’s a limit to it
unlike your love, it was never ending
one look at your smile and you had me
everything was fine
i thought you were the light of my night
instead, you were my darkest daydream

[verse 4]
you took control of me but did it gracefully
i had a a new breath to breathe
a new song to sing
i matched my heart with yours rhythmically
every step a new adventure
with you by my side we’d take on the darkest times
no worries, because you captured me
highs and lows
your love surrounding every aspect of my life
a power unmatched, even though we still made mistakes
every loss turned into gain
learning to show grace
our strength growing each day

[verse 5]
i found my everything in you
i was everything with you
now i’m on my own, lost in the world
i’m needing you
here on my arm, back in my heart
this winters cold
like a calabasas rose
i froze without your warmth
i’m missing you
i’m still here
but you’ve gone away
even when you said you’d stay
i need you
and i need that life you give
that love you share
the way you make the world better
the way you’re there

[outro]
maybe now you’re rememberin’ things changed
we stand on a cliff overlooking the ocean
the waves rolling and flowing in motion
the wind blowing through your hair
reminiscent of your love without care
wondering if there’s anywhere for us to thrive
it’s a battle fighting to survive
to keep alive what once was
but i still hold onto hope, because you never know
and i hope you know my heart for you
everyday you’re on my mind
wishing i was holding onto you

- jason henshaw lyrics

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