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accident? (demo) - jam mechanics lyrics

i was walking to work today
crossing the street, you gotta look both ways, i know
but today i just stepped out with my eyes closed
three narrow misses and a screaming driver
i made it safely to the other side and
i open my notebook and i write
“experiment 9: success” and underline it

yeah, i think i’m immortal
the signs are becoming unignorable

it all started a week ago
i woke up with a weird feeling and so i did
what any reasonable person ought to do
jumped out the window barely caught a sprain
walked on the tracks and tried to stop a train

yeah, i think i’m immortal
the signs are becoming unignorable
how else would you explain it?

i’m god, i think i always knew
i’m god, you’re not, that sucks for you
i thought that i was special and i guess i was
now all you motherf*ckers better pray because i’m god
i’m god
my first commandment is all love songs are now about me
my second commandment is thou shalt not order in food without leaving some aside for me
you know, like as offering
my third commandment is the workday now starts at 4 p.m
and finishes at 4:45 p.m
two days a week
my fourth commandment is the summer will never rise above a pleasant temperature, and i’m scottish so, prepare for some cold weather over there
my fifth commandment is f*ckin’– commands are hard to come up with, i’ma take a break
woo!

my sixth commandment is free healthcare for all, sorry, i really should have thought of that sooner
my seventh commandment is vampires are real and they’re s*xy
my eighth commandment is that we should actually probably defang the vampires, but i acknowledge that a lot of their s*x appeal comes from how dangerous they are, so…
uh, i dunno, leave that with me
my ninth commandment is no war, no famine, no poverty, no bloodsports, no long layovers, no disappointing endings to novels, no greenhouse gases, no mandatory mailing list signups, no hidden fees, no gods, no masters, no, actually scr*p– you didn’t write that down, did you?
d’you– don’t– don’t write that bit down
okay
my tenth commandment is the vampires leave you alone unless you consent to be bitten
i think that solves that problem

oh
i’m god, i think i always knew
i’m god, you’re not, that sucks for you
i thought that i was special and i guess i was
now all you motherf*ckers better pray because i’m god
i’m god
*screeching tires*
i’m–
whoop, f*ck
*car crash, sirens*
ugh
ough, you wrote it down, didn’t you
*groaning*

- jam mechanics lyrics

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