because the internet - jalin roberson lyrics
tires screech outside. dude 2 stands up. there’s a small crash outside
yelling
voice: freeze!
gunshots
the boy and dude 2 look at each other
dude 2, upon hearing the noise, grabs the boy by the neck and holds him hostage, not taking any chances
fam walks in bleeding, screaming at the top of his lungs, holding what seems to be a gold ak-47
fam
let —– go!
dude 2 yells back something, something, something…
the boy doesn’t understand what they’re yelling about anymore, nor does he care to listen anymore
the boy
if you’re going to k!ll me, do it already
dude 2 looks stunned, not understanding why the boy wants to die so much
in the distance, all 3 men can hear the sirens blare, signaling the arrival of dude 2’s army
fam knowing that him and the boy do not have much time, takes the shot, but misses and hits the boy in the heart
dude 2 stands there awkwardly as fam runs to the boy screaming in apologetic sobs that even though the thought is there, cannot fix the mangled heart of the boy
the boy thinks as he is dying about how he wishes he coulda died in the pool
the boy (weakly with a smile)
hey fam i’m dead yo…
fam (tears falling, but laughing slightly)
…yeah… you’re dead yo
fade out
int. hallway – day
a phone is ringing in the hallway, next to a statue that’s buddhist
the boy gets out of bed, with a large migrane, possibly from a hangover and steps over the empty bottle of alcohol and pizza boxes and makes his way down stair
the boy is holding his chest subconciously
the boy picks up the phone
lady on the phone
h-llo, this is the califax collection-
the boy hangs up the phone and blacks out
——-[play song “life: the biggest troll” at this point]——-
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