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alphabet track roast - j-smoove lyrics

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a starts with alex, what i say i won’t repent
couldn’t jump, couldn’t run and no longer president
like andy says you a has been. your presidency was like franklin pierce’s, who the f*ck remembers him?

that brings me to andy thinking you all high and mighty
always wanna talk “me me me” but i got my own record, you needed a super team a*la kd

adam and anthony ain’t safe, i’m handing out fades
y’all both barely talk favorite game must be charades

b for y’all bums, i’m talking about the alums. finna go stupid on this track everybody gets some

c for our new president y’all know her as ciara
so short she gotta yell just so i can hear her
let you off easy baking you is no fun, i murdered the last president that makes you a johnson

d is for dre, don’t think you escaped my rhymes
imma cop, you do a crime breaking the bro code you gotta do the tyme

des used to hoop but i can’t see why, 5 foot 2 clamped you up like i’m kawhi. here set me up with this lob
i’m the only coach from last year that ain’t lose his job

e is for eli i really don’t got sh*t to say
tall, nice white man, wait i just described pj

g is for garret, we got similar hair but my flow is like your hamstring i’m onna tear
i know you’re a rapper but i’m on yo back, stick to only one of your careers on the track
h. i. y’all we onto j which is yours trulys letter. this rap sh*t this track sh*t i’m just better

josh gets high, 100m in jalen dies
so many johns on this team y’all sure they not the same guy???

*shouts out kaleigh cuz she’s so nice*

now we at keyana, after this y’all gon say d*mn
all these dudes on the team, not 1 wanna be yo man(d*mn)

let’s get straight to m, matt steele no matter what you always win
even with yo might, still can’t do sh*t about your height 🙁

up next is melissa, i don’t wanna diss her
don’t think we ain’t see you with nico, come on bro just kiss her

mason gotta m and also alotta ladies
on top of that 2 bad knees, a bad hairline, and some scabies

that bring me to young fanz aka nico
i said what i said but just pick up that second f*cking phase bro!!

*j smoove figures out loops*

now we at natasha, who got her own lil p*wns
accomplice to andre’s crime, bro code with him and shan
they say my rhymes op, quite reassuring. now i’m onto s where i’m really finna get to cooking

start off with steven, y’all know he’s my og
always in his feels, jaded, kinda like me. but where we differ is on the court, imma animal and you come up a lil short

next line imma go a different route. says weird things, bad running form, wait which shan/shawn am i talking bout??

tati holds down the t spot. lil do y’all know y’all just part of her teapot

*j smoove is not the smartest tool in the shed*

y is for yousuf, he’s muslim imma take him out with a bang
actually i know how to get rid of him i’ll just call jang

finally we got zoe aka miss no show. this a rap song so you ain’t safe even if you’ve got to go go

*j smoove begins freestyling to let &ito, bienduga, and cashtheg know hes superior.*

imma demon on the track and in the stu now
stand on all my bars got me looking like yao

ming, i got all this bling this a freestyle i ain’t even plan a thing. woo

imma demon on this track, i got h*lla energy like i’m smoking crack

yeah wait. that’s against the law, i’m ballin on this f*cking court like i’m the klaw woooo
yeah, y’all can’t f*ck with me, j*a*d. that’s my f*cking letters. uh like i said i’m just better

*j smoove falls apart cuz he actually sucks at freestyles. he then mumbles about random sh*t listen if you want**

- j smoove lyrics

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