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838 - isaiah thxmvs lyrics

(verse 1)
this was the story of a day when i was 17
the culmination of my teenage years had just begun
i had so many goals and entered many day dreams
i went through so much and much of it was just not for fun
to sum it all up the hard times were just at a n-gga’s door
this place that i was placed was truly unfamiliar
man it was do or die or i was just real insecure
about my fate, or just what direction that i should go towards

inside my head, that was the grounds for a war
physically, i walked around and really tried to ignore
the fact that n-ggas plotted on me, waited for my downfall
but i never helped them to quench their thirst for failing black boys

i was a witness, and i seen the other ugly side
the side that many people hide
from human view
the side that many other people knew that lingered there
the very side that many others truly came to fear
yes i was scared

there came a point in time where months had started boiling down
they started telling me to get it right and get it down
i had to work and try to make that ultimatum anyhow
there was so much at stake, i’m just tryna keep me from drowning

head goes under
then comes up
i’m breathing heavy now
there is no reason that death should be this easy
i’m contemplating being buried now
just 6 feet further from my problems if i’m in the ground

(verse 2)
i wake up
from out that dream and living life seems like a nightmare
i had no hope and 838 was a fight with fear
of failure from the pressure
it’s whatever
there was no signs of my old situation then, that it was getting better
i thought, i’m out of luck
like what the f-ck i been praying for
now if all my prayers were getting ignored
i started losing faith
i ain’t keep up with games that’s being played anymore
all i had wanted was to head for the door
i had enough
of me sleeping on floors
tired of all the lying, and crying
they look at my face
and all that they see is a broken child
who just wants to escape
because of the stories shrouded in lies
we could let the real just be revealed
and be a glorious find
but instead of that ending
they had chose the alternate story
the mirror i looked in, shattered in tiny pieces before me
i creaked and i bent from carrying weight from sins done before me
again and again the cycle repeats
and it’s deplorable n-gga

there came a time where i had thought i was finished
where i had thought my fate was sealed and was written
i overcame the heartbreak and the pain
most of my giants, they had been slain
but was still a fight just like abel and cain
it was a struggle for light in the dark
i came and i seen it all
i saw the rise to the peak
and i saw the terrible fall from glory
it was horrid, everything started falling apart
nothing was going at all, no one would answer
there is no one you can call

that was a time in itself
the was a time for me being alone and learning myself
that was a sp-ce that had taught me to deal with cards i was dealt
and make a k!lling, believing somehow that i’d make it out

that point in time was too real
i took the good and the bad
sometimes you just gotta keep moving forward, no looking back
sometimes you know, you just might really need to gain with the weights
next time, i know that we’re all gonna have our 838’s
and we’ll be straight, yeah

- isaiah thxmvs lyrics

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