coldwind - idk cutno lyrics
feels like i’m breaking in this environment
somebody call the firemen, this flame is getting violent
inside of my gut, it feels the falsest sense of entitlement
my head get empty and i remember what the title meant
i spent a couple of years trying to find it
the shore’s a long way and my demons swimming with tridents
i hope to get to heaven but i don’t know the requiremеnts
is life’s retiremеnt spoiled by all of our indictments?
yes i remember: 21st of september
whenever i felt my life slip into this era
of pain because my granny died and i ain’t get to say goodbye
because in my head i said that madeline’d be fine
but yo, i wonder what’d she say if she was looking at me
could she look into my eyes and tell her grandson was unhappy?
would she tell me to stop focusing on meghan, cat, and abby?
momo, i need the faith you preached so badly
i got a bible that i keep right by my tv
i swear i’m looking out for god but he just never see me
i’m hoping he could free me, i’m trynna live so freely
not when i’m old and weakly, on my own terms uniquely
routinely i go through this pain* that’s fine
brush the dirt up off your shoulder, sip something stronger than wine
because your pain’s swallowed you can by some time
but that’s really just some grime that’s on my mind
is it normal to feel like a broken record?
repeating that i’m in pain and i’m dealing with this depression
discretion is not a sk!ll, i k!lled any bush you could beat around
because your soul needs cold truth to get it found
to that, most people can’t even open up to the sound
because a little glass of truth’s enough to get you drowned
that’s why i hide my true colors as vulgar and profound
how many problems can i bring? i’m losing count
and just to clear it up i ain’t really that n*gga that you think that you’ve been seeing, i’m just conscious while i’m dreaming
and i always find myself just f*cking boxing with my demons calling out to brighter spirits i don’t know if i believe in
momma try to tell me if i keep a little faith and keep my head up out the sp*ce i’ll be the biggest in the place
for every moment that i’m angry and a red comes to my face i’m adding minutes that i waste instead of bringing in the steaks
but i’m sick of feeling like i don’t deserve sh*t
i live my life right on the opposite of perfect
you should’ve told me baby that i make you nervous
the path you taking it’s just gonna leave us hurting
every b*tch that a n*gga ran through, since the seventh of june, was just to get over you
yeah i’m blue, but i don’t have clue, what ima do, should i shoot? should i look for the answers inside an
alternate dimension, suspension from all the tension that’s been
pinching my conscious and i can not begin to mention
this declension of jubilation, you taking god’s creation
with a pistol and i miss him ‘cause we had our blood relation
think about the funeral jermaine was preaching at
auntie crying ‘cause you took a son that she not bringing back
all you wack ass fake shooters don’t gotta think of that
but all you wake ass fake shooters don’t wanna think of that
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